Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Why on earth would you want that many gazelles anyway?

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The Random Truck

800 trillion million billion times better than the ice cream man
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The Random Truck (when you say that, emphasize "random," not "truck") drives around town unmarked. At random times the back opens up, revealing a completely random event going on, be it clowns practicing kung-fu, ninjas playing frisbee, or perhaps a reenactment of the American Civil War using only 2 people with Pringles cans.

The Random Truck will appear at random times in random places, with a higher chance of being in heavy road-rage inducing traffic to calm everyone's nerves.

There will, of course, be the RTC (Random Truck Chasers) constantly waiting for The Random Truck with cameras and notebooks to record the occurence.
AfroAssault, Oct 12 2001


technobadger, Oct 12 2001

       New ICP sh*t? I'll eat.
reensure, Oct 12 2001

       I like!
The_Englishman_Abroad, Oct 12 2001

       Nice, but the interior sounds a bit violent, all martial arts and inter-American strife. Could we not have clowns teaching spiders to tap-dance, and members of the Norwegian royal family doing humourous masques about the discovery of the Bering Strait? And it would have to change its colour, make or appearance regularly of course.
pottedstu, Oct 12 2001

       pottedstu- I only offered a few of the millions of possible random things that could happen inside The Random Truck. Also, the truck itself will be a random truck everytime, and this is entirely volunteer (except for the gas, people can make donations in random places at random times). I mean, wouldn't you volunteer to be on The Random Truck?
AfroAssault, Oct 12 2001

       I love randomness of nearly all varieties (pain is not included). This sounds great to someone with an I.Q of less than a glass of orange juice suchas myslef. Seeing as people like me make up much of today's world I propose that this idea should become baked.
kaz, Oct 12 2001

       random is good
dekoi, Oct 12 2001

       Let's start a charitable fund for it. Or never mind the truck: people should just stop their cars in traffic jams, stick their heads thru the sun-roof and give a quick playlet about the introduction of avocadoes to the old world by Glenn Miller and his subsequent murder by the British Royal Air Force. Or any other aspect of big band music, military history or fruit. With government grants for props.
pottedstu, Oct 12 2001

       Stopping cars in traffic for no apparent reason - baked.

yelling stuff out the car window - baked.

We need the actual The Random Truck (no calling it Random Truck, it's THE Random Truck)
AfroAssault, Oct 12 2001

       This would indeed be better than the ice cream truck, but a recent Harris poll indicates that the improvement factor would only be 4,701 (much less than 800 trillion million billion, I'm afraid). That's inflation for you.   

       A ha'bunny for you anyway.   

       And I suppose it would be powered by a slightly-less-than-infinite improbability drive?
beauxeault, Oct 12 2001

       OK, you win. It'd have to be like the A-Team's van some of the time, and occasionally like the Scooby Doo crew's van, and sometimes even like an ice cream truck.
pottedstu, Oct 12 2001

       wow i'd rather have a bit of randomness than an ice cream any day, especially as there is the slight probability of the randomness involving ice cream, but almost no chance of the ice cream involving randomness the truck should occaisionally be a mini or a hippy van, just for posterity, and to truly live up to its name (it will be a much more Random Truck if it is actually a hippy bus) i also like the RTC-they are like anoraks, only purposefully random (or is that a bit of a paradox?)   

       Random Annotation: There is a funky restaurant in Orlando that serves only appetizers, and is a lot like this. There are always a couple of artists painting and making things and then while you are eating, without warning, a fire-eater, a belly-dancer, a juggler, or whatever pops out doing their thing. It's excellent.
zigness, Jan 21 2006

       How do you ensure that the staged events are actually random and not just a reflection of the interests of the scheduler? A program that uses random picks out of the dictionary to form "<random_noun> doing <random_verb> with <random_noun> in the style of <random_genre>"? Would you have to randomise the structure of the aforesuggested phrase? The randomness has already been restricted enough by ruling out anything that won't fit in a truck ("Scuba divers chasing electric eels in glass Saturn V rocket to the Benny Hill theme music." is out aready) - this must be as random as possible.
wagster, Jan 21 2006


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