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The Whateleytons

Family values ...
  [vote for,

Some readers may be familiar with the H P Lovecraft story "The Dunwich Horror" which chronicles the events surrounding an evil New England backwoods family called the Whateleys in the early 20th century.

Rather more may be regretfully aware of a TV series called "The Waltons", a seemingly interminable saga of tedious country folk in Virginia in the early 20th century.

In "The Dunwich Horror", many of the domestic details of the Whateley family's bizarre, blasphemous life are omitted - which seems something of a missed opportunity.

We propose a TV series called "The Whateleytons", which week by week chronicles the lives, loves and ancient evil rituals of witchcraft of an everyday Dunwich family; Old Whateley, head of the household and a "wizard"; Lavinia his deformed albino daughter; Wilbur his grandson - a three metre tall half-human, half malevolent being From Beyond; Wilbur's twin, a huge, invisible, almost non-physical destructive vampiric alien entity; and numerous others who don't appear as more than casual mentions in the original narrative, including the Elder Thing from Outside, Yog-Sothoth, who wants to exterminate humanity and drag the Earth off into a different set of dimensions for evil purposes.

At the very end of each episode, there is a homely, reassuring feelgood scene where the various family members wish one another good night, and swear undying allegence to the powers of Darkness and Evil.

8th of 7, Jul 18 2019

The Dunwich Horror https://en.wikipedi.../The_Dunwich_Horror
Considered part of the Cthulhu Mythos [8th of 7, Jul 18 2019]

The Waltons https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Waltons
Considered worse than having your brain sucked out by a tentacled monstrosity from other dimensions. [8th of 7, Jul 18 2019]

The Welsh book http://www.innsmout...n-tales-from-wales/
Does what is says on the tin of Mi-go [not_morrison_rm, Jul 21 2019]

His guests frequently resemble the Whateleys. https://www.drphil.com/about-dr-phil/
Grotesque horror. [RayfordSteele, Jul 22 2019]


       //half-human, half malevolent being From Beyond// I've always been troubled by postulations of human/non-human hybrids. Modern humans were evidently cross-fertile with H. neanderthalensis and a few other members of the Homo genus, but we're probably not cross-fertile with chimps, bonobos or gorillas because two of the chimp/bonobo/gorilla chromosomes fused into one in the line that led to humans, making us karyotypically incompatible.   

       So, anything that we're going to hybridise too is going to have to be closer to us, evolutionarily speaking, than chimps. I don't know how far away Beyond is, or whether it was populated by early humans before continental drift put it Beyond, but it seems unlikely. Of course there's always estate agents, but I doubt they breed even with their own kind. At least I hope not.   

       Actually, thinking about it, it probably wouldn't be difficult to re-split the human chromosome that was two chromosomes in chimps - the human chromosome retains vestiges of telomeric sequence at the fusion point. The resulting human would be 48,XX or 48,XY instead of 46, but would probably be fairly normal and might be interfertile with chimps. In fact, it's very likely that somewhere out there is a human who is already 48,XX or 48,XY.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 18 2019

       This is the Addams family reanimated by Borg morality.
4and20, Jul 18 2019

       Our understanding is that estate agents hatch from pods, after assuming the identity of nearby humans while they are asleep.   

       The Beings from the Outer Darkness aren't anywhere near that evil; they're probably jealous. Or frightened. Or both.
8th of 7, Jul 18 2019

       I have to say, having tried to get into H.P. Lovecraft's works, I concluded that they are the most enormous pile of steaming drivel that has ever seen print.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 18 2019

       They are certainly 'an' enormous pile of steaming drivel; but whether they are 'the' most enormous pile of steaming drivel that has ever seen print is debateable. After all, it's a wide field, with some pretty fearsome competition - Barbara Cartland, Adolf Hitler, David Beckham, or indeed your own Ph.D. thesis ...
8th of 7, Jul 18 2019

       D. Phil, actually.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 18 2019

       //D. Phil, actually// Steady on, old chap.
pertinax, Jul 19 2019

       // can't even make their own universes (scientifically) consistent. //   

       It doesn't need to be - it's just entertainment; although [MB] did have the same problem with his thesis. Lives in a world of his own, you know.   

       It could have been worse - he could have written it himself rather than stealing it off Phil. But the academic world is justifiably suspicious of any work written in green crayon on toilet paper.
8th of 7, Jul 19 2019

       There is a Welsh collection of Cthulhu stories....
not_morrison_rm, Jul 19 2019

       I think that merely reinforces my earlier point.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 19 2019

       Indeed. Given the utter unpronouncability of the polysyllabic, largely vowel-free names in the mythos, which in fact are almost indistinguishable from gibberish, a welsh origin makes perfect sense.
8th of 7, Jul 19 2019

       ‘D. Phil’, yes I tried watching him once. He wasn’t that interesting...
RayfordSteele, Jul 19 2019

       The Welsh one wasn't too bad, and now I know the URL of the www.innsmouthfreepress.com.   

       It's best to look on Lovecraft's stuff as a fever dream, so if that's not your cup of shoggoth, don't read it,
not_morrison_rm, Jul 21 2019

       // So, anything that we're going to hybridise too is going to have to be closer to us, evolutionarily speaking, than chimps//   

       It's this kind of refusal to believe the evidence, from the ample illustrations of the minotaur to countless sighting of merfolk, to your best friend's harpy wife, that makes us so mad about scientists and the obvious subjectivity with which they choose what they want the rest of us to believe.
theircompetitor, Jul 21 2019

       I can fathom a mutated 46 'chromosomed' chimp. Given that there would not have been any 46 chromosome humans around at that stage of the evolutionary tree, I just can't picture a second 46 chromosome, opposite gender, chimp to be within mating distance. I don't think Tinder was around then for the chimp to list his preferences.
tumblewit, Jul 21 2019

       A certain resemblance between the crawling chaos and Sturton...just mentioning it...
not_morrison_rm, Jul 22 2019

       //I just can't picture a second 46 chromosome, opposite gender, chimp// That is a good point. So either:   

       (a) It mated with a regular 48' chimp and produced fertile offspring (in which case chimp/human hybrids could be viable, at least sometimes) or   

       (b) It mated with a sibling with the same chromosome make-up or   

       (c) dunno.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 22 2019

       // (b) It mated with a sibling with the same chromosome make-up //   

       Too much information. No-one here wants to know the sordid details of your ancestry, given that your family "tree" bears a striking resemblance to a hybrid of a Venus Fly Trap, poison ivy, and a Triffid.
8th of 7, Jul 22 2019

       Careful, [8th], or I'll send my uncle and nephew round to sort you out. He's quite intimidating.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 22 2019


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