h a l f b a k e r yPoof of concept
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During winter I have a tendancy towards the blues. It's not full-blown SAD, I just get a bit down when every day starts by waking up in darkness with an alarm blaring.
So... I bought myself a sunrise light (link) which comes on gradually over the course of half an hour before sounding its nasty
alarm. I usually set the volume of the alarm to zero anyway, as I'm already awake by then and don't require an irritating bleep in my earhole.
I can't help thinking how much nicer it would be if instead of a bleepy alarm, the simulated sunrise finished with the sound of a tent zip opening - that's probably my favourite sound to hear first thing in the morning.
Maybe it could also play birdsong and the sound of distant cattle lowing.
Sunrise Systems Alarm
http://www.amazon.c...100US/dp/B000GG327G [wagster, Sep 27 2009]
Sunrise Nature Sounds Alarm Clock
http://www.hktdc.co.../Sunrise_Clock.html "Soothing Nature Sound Machine: 10 Sounds: Birds, Brooks, Nightingale, Waves in Beach, Brooks & birds, Rain, Hear Beating, Digital Alarm, Bell Alarm Sound, Telephone ring!" I take it "hear beating" is more of an urban inner-city themed soundscape? [jutta, Sep 27 2009]
Sunrise Nature Sounds Alarm Clock (II)
http://www.amazon.c...Clock/dp/B001KW8BK8 Read the reviews before ordering - it's a piece of crap. [jutta, Sep 27 2009]
Natural light alarm clocks
http://www.gadgetsh...un-alarm-clock.html [RayfordSteele, Sep 29 2009]
[link]
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I'm sorry, but the sound of a zipper and a cow has all sorts of wrong connotations. |
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Most cities have a public park; all you need is a tent, and a cow sound alarm clock. |
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I've got one of those sunrise alarms and MINE plays
sounds!! You can choose Birds (quite good) Rain (sounds
like a chip-pot boiling) and another one, that I've
forgotten! (jutta beat me to the links, but I'm in full flight
now, so I'll continue. |
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You could of course extend your tent effects notion to
include the sound of tearing fabric as a meandering cow
interacts with the canvas - OR if you just knew you HAD to
get up - an angry farmer's voice bellowing: "Who the
bloody hell do you think you are? - just you wait till I load
up this shot-gun with rock-salt" Anyway - it's a nice
thought + |
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The future's not what it could be any more. |
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The 90's would have been a much different era had we all
been 'Sorted for Nature Sound Alarm Clocks'! Perhaps if
everyone was woken up to that, they wouldn't feel like taking
mind altering substances! |
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Now I'm hoping that story would be a setting on the WUIaF clock. |
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I like to hear my tent zip open in the morning when I fall asleep with my jeans on. |
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"It was daylight when you woke up in your ditch. You looked up at your sky, then that made blue be your color. You had your knife there with you too. when you stood up there was goo all over your clothes. Your hands were sticky. You wiped them on your grass, so now your color was green. Oh Lord, why did everything always have to keep changing like this. You were already getting nervous again. Your head hurt and it rang when you stood up. Your head was almost empty. It always hurt when you woke up like this. You crawled out of your ditch onto your gravel road and began to walk, waiting for the rest of your mind to come back to you. You can see the car parked far down the road and you walked towards it. "If god is our father," you thought, then Satan must be our cousin." Why didn't anyone else understand these important things? You got to your car and tried all the doors. They were locked. It was a red car and it was new. There was an expensive leather camera case laying on the seat. Out across your field, you could see two tiny people walking by your woods. You began to walk towards them. Now red was your color and, of course, those little people were yours too." |
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Also, cell phones fucking suck. Why does everyone find them to be the solution to all of our problems? Oh wait, not everyone. |
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You talk about this like I was just thawed out yesterday. My point is that they fucking suck. |
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everything electronic sucks es |
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There are alarm clocks that are designed to wake you up with 'natural light.' You might look into one of these. |
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Um, Wagster mentioned the light alarm in the body of the idea, unless you mean one that wakes you with just light and no alarm. |
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" You talk about this like I was just thawed out yesterday " |
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I'm going through all the alarm clock threads looking for links to my next alarm clock. My Zen Alarm, which chimes a little chime, continues to display erratic behaviour, which is apparently common for these things. |
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The simulated sunrise clocks apparently suck as well. If I could find a music player that brought it in soft and gradually raised it that would be cool, but everything is so on/off. |
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Is there such a thing as a Baconsmade? |
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In bucolic mode, the simulated sunrise greets the sleeper with sounds of birdsong and distant cattle lowing. |
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In stampede mode, the distant lowing gradually grows louder and more feverish, and the sound of hoof beats increases from a spattering to a thunderous roar. Rather than ending with a bleepy alarm, the clock spews trail dust into the air and actuates pneumatic pumps in your bed frame that shake it violently. |
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A properly programmed Roomba could periodically refill the "traildust" without user interaction. |
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I find that whatever I wake up to, I come to
associate with waking up for work after not enough
sleep. The reason the sound of a tent/cattle
whatever is appealing is because its a holiday sound.
Play the same sound associated with dragging
yourself out of bed in the dark and you'll ruin it. This
has happened with a couple of favorite
songs/sounds. |
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// Is there such a thing as a Baconsmade? // |
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Initial experiments with a pig, a hundred
kilos of salt/sodium nitrite mix, and an array
of George Foreman grills attached to a
timeswitch yield the answer "Not quite yet,
no." |
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