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World Wooden Spoon

Who has the worst football team in the world?
  (+9, -2)
(+9, -2)
  [vote for,

Even residents of the USA may have noticed that there is a football competition currently being held in Japan and Korea called the "World Cup" and also that the "World" in its title imples the presence of teams from more than one country.

My idea is simple: The teams that failed to qualify for the World Cup take part in a parallel competition - they're divided up into groups, they each play everyone else in their group, and then the *bottom* two teams go through to the playoffs. From then on, in each case the losing team goes on to the next stage and the final is played between the two worst teams in the world. The loser is presented with an impressive golden "Wooden Spoon" trophy.
hippo, Jun 12 2002

Joel Stein on "Soccer" http://www.time.com...0617-260725,00.html
"When I hear that Tunisia is playing Belgium for the crucial Group H runner-up spot, all I want is a map. The only way Americans are going to learn another country's name is if it attacks us." [waugsqueke, Jun 12 2002]

The Worst Team In The World http://www.fifa.com/rank/index_E.html
According to FIFA world rankings, the worst team in the world is Montserrat, in position 203. Carefull, uses iFrames. [[ sctld ], Jun 12 2002]

SoccerAge Prediction http://www.soccerage.com/en/13/e2107.html
"If the bend-but-not-break defense can hold, the U.S. could make it as far as the Quarterfinals." [phoenix, Jun 12 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

"Bhutan prepares to meet Montserrat" http://www.kuenselo...de7203f36b9bf590b2f
From Bhutan's national newspaper. [sappho]

Bhutan v Monserrat http://www.concacaf...ws/article.page/702
from CONCACAF (the Confereration Of North, Central American And Caribbean Association Football) [sappho, Jun 19 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Bhutan v Monserrat http://www.concacaf...ws/article.page/702
from CONCACAF (the Confereration Of North, Central American And Caribbean Association Football) [st3f, Jun 19 2002, last modified Oct 17 2004]

Wikipedia: Wooden Spoon http://en.wikipedia...ooden_spoon_(award)
[rcarty, Jun 16 2010]


       <slightly off topic>See link for a hilarious article by Joel Stein in this week's US issue of Time, about the US lack of interest in the World Cup.</slightly off topic>
waugsqueke, Jun 12 2002

       My money would be on Nepal. They're not from a continent that's famed for its footballing prowess plus they probably don't have too much flat ground to practice on. What's to stop a team getting all their players to commit sending off offences in the first 5 minutes though? Would extra points be given to a team that still couldn't score with no opposition?
stupop, Jun 12 2002

       I'm going to have to vote against this [hippo] - good idea, but I have a nasty feeling Scotland would probably end up winning it.
mcscotland, Jun 12 2002

       Aw, come on, mcscotland, it'd be nice to win *something* for once! It sounds kind of like an inverted UEFA Cup competition. Don't know how you'd stop teams playing badly on purpose, though, or was that part of the plan?
salachair, Jun 12 2002

       Here's one American who's interested, and has been for other World Cup competitions in the past. Say what you like about France, but Les Bleus in 1998 really showed why it's called "the beautiful game." This year, England seems to have caught some of what the French had then. Maybe it's that dirty rotten foreigner they have for a coach...
beauxeault, Jun 12 2002

       Well we're there. What more do you want?
phoenix, Jun 12 2002

       [waugs]: re your link, there's only one thing about the World Cup that prevents me from caring: it involves soccer.
angel, Jun 13 2002

       Montserrat are playing Bhutan for the title of the worst team in the world - it was on the Today programme this morning - apparently Montserratians are really excited about it. finding link now...
sappho, Jun 19 2002

       crown Sven next King.
po, Jun 19 2002

       [sappho] I sort of half-heard the end of that piece on the Today programme. I think the Monserrat government must have been reading the HalfBakery...
hippo, Jun 19 2002

       I'll coissant this one for one reason only. A non-ice surfarce televised world championship that Canada might win. Even if the point of the tourney is to find out who's the worst, Canadians like winning stuff.
HomerX, Oct 04 2002

       ...and who will win the wooden spoon this year?
hippo, Jun 23 2006

       wooden you like to know
xenzag, Jun 23 2006

       Why a wooden spoon? (Nevermind Link)
rcarty, Jun 16 2010

       For those of us who were/are huge fans of the late great baskeball coach of UCLA, John Wooden,(who died on June 4, 2010 at the age of 99) this would be a sad sort of memorial. During his 27 years as head coach of the UCLA Bruins his teams achieved a 620-147 (80.8% wins) record and won an unprecedented 10 NCAA championships, including seven in a row (1967-1973). A legend in his own time, Wooden is almost universally revered by baskeball fans and athletic coaches around the world for his accomplishments and his character. Let's call the "Worst Losers" trophy something else.
jurist, Jun 16 2010

       Perhaps some sort of "Slotted Spoon" award might be more appropriate, as the losing teams let all their best opportunities slip through their grasp.
jurist, Jun 16 2010

       A wooden spork.   


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