Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Your Donated Organs As A Brand

Complete with art, slogans, jingles, the whole bit.
  [vote for,

I'm always kind of creeped out by restaurants selling formerly live food items that feature a cartoon representation that food item in its living state lending enthusiastic facial expressions and wing, hoof or paw gestures to the killing, gutting, cutting up and cooking of themselves. The happy, even ecstatic chicken beckoning you to come in and eat its legs. The cow licking its chops because his body is so delicious that if he weren't dead, he'd eat him himself. Now just because it's a bit creepy doesn't mean I don't eat at those places all the time.

So if it can work to sell animal body parts, why not try the same approach with humans?

When you sign up to Remutron Organ Donation, we create a brand for you. Say your name is Bob Jones and you want to donate your kidneys upon death. We'll create a smiling cartoon character representation of you, perhaps winking and giving the "OK" thumb to forefinger sign with a catchy "product" name like "Bob Jones Regal-Renal 9000 Grade A Kidneys" and a slogan like "No kidney stones, when you've got Bob Jones!".

Your body parts will arrive in an artwork emblazoned container with your smiling face assuring the recipient that they're receiving a great set of kidneys.

What the hell? Giving the recipient a laugh as well as the gift of life might be a pretty classy final act eh?

doctorremulac3, Mar 17 2019

Chicken... https://stock.adobe...gle-layer/214837741
[doctorremulac3, Mar 17 2019]

...cow... https://www.shutter...ing-apron-141117790
[doctorremulac3, Mar 17 2019]

Bob Jones Brand Kidneys https://www.shutter...k-gesture-522692821
When you've got a set of Jones', say goodbye to stones! [doctorremulac3, Mar 17 2019]

Happy restaurant animals https://www.nbc.com...ckin-chicken/n10352
Cluckin' Chicken [doctorremulac3, Mar 17 2019]

The Restaurant at the End of the Universe https://www.youtube...watch?v=bAF35dekiAY
[Voice, Mar 17 2019]

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       //The happy, even ecstatic chicken beckoning you to come in and eat it's legs. The cow licking its chops because his body is so delicious that if he weren't dead, he'd eat him himself//   

       "Something off the shoulder perhaps?" suggested the animal, "braised in a white wine sauce?"   

       The chicken could be indicating the great grains and insects at the restaurant. The cow, great swede, pumpkin or cabbage(not Marijuana leaf) on offer. Just saying.
wjt, Mar 17 2019

       Na, he's just really excited about being killed, gutted, chopped into pieces, eaten and turned into fecal matter. (see link, commercial plays before video)
doctorremulac3, Mar 17 2019

       Sorry [doc], the internet walls consider me not to have the right standing place. Thankfully.
wjt, Mar 17 2019


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