Your Donated Organs As A Brand

I'm always kind of creeped out by restaurants selling formerly live food items that feature a cartoon representation that food item in its living state lending enthusiastic facial expressions and wing, hoof or paw gestures to the killing, gutting, cutting up and cooking of themselves. The happy, even ecstatic chicken beckoning you to come in and eat its legs. The cow licking its chops because his body is so delicious that if he weren't dead, he'd eat him himself. Now just because it's a bit creepy doesn't mean I don't eat at those places all the time.

So if it can work to sell animal body parts, why not try the same approach with humans?

When you sign up to Remutron Organ Donation, we create a brand for you. Say your name is Bob Jones and you want to donate your kidneys upon death. We'll create a smiling cartoon character representation of you, perhaps winking and giving the "OK" thumb to forefinger sign with a catchy "product" name like "Bob Jones Regal-Renal 9000 Grade A Kidneys" and a slogan like "No kidney stones, when you've got Bob Jones!".

Your body parts will arrive in an artwork emblazoned container with your smiling face assuring the recipient that they're receiving a great set of kidneys.

What the hell? Giving the recipient a laugh as well as the gift of life might be a pretty classy final act eh?