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"Now Benzene free!" stickers

  [vote for,

A set of stickers, to be surreptitiously stuck on random items in the supermarket.
hippo, May 28 2012

Abestos-free! https://xkcd.com/641/
[Spacecoyote, May 28 2012]

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       Or even: Free Benzene Now! (with a little graphic of an anthropomorphic version of the chemical peering out from behind a set of prison bars)
xenzag, May 28 2012

       Particulalrly suitable for coffee, spices, herbs, indeed anything Aromatic…   

8th of 7, May 28 2012

       Exactly - the kind of reaction I'd want is "Ah, that's good, my favourite brand of coffee contains no benzene - wait! are they saying it used to contain benzene?"
hippo, May 28 2012

       //"Now Benzene free!"   

       What happens if you put it on a bottle of benzene?
not_morrison_rm, May 28 2012

       You don't have to pay ?
8th of 7, May 28 2012

       ////"Now Benzene free!"

What happens if you put it on a bottle of benzine?
-- not_morrison_rm, May 28 2012//

That would be OK, as Benzene and Benzine are (I think) different substances.
hippo, May 28 2012

       ok, ok I can't spell benzeen...
not_morrison_rm, May 28 2012

       This would be great if the stickers used a benzene- based adhesive.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 28 2012

       ...with an explanation in small font: "Benzene is not good for you..."
Inyuki, May 28 2012

       You'll be found out when old people start calling up to complain about the change.
rcarty, May 28 2012

       <Col Kilgore>   

       "I love the smell of benzene in the morning …"   

8th of 7, May 28 2012

       "For rectal use only" had a good run a few years back.
tatterdemalion, May 28 2012

       Sticker needs small print: "Warning - this sticker can only be removed with a solvent containing benzene"
xenzag, May 28 2012

       Now, with 20% fewer carcinogens!   

       I'm pretty sure marketing is all in the way you say it. You could probably write: "More than twice the benzene of other products!" and people would be impressed. We live in a culture where people take anti-oxidants before they to go the oxygen bar.
doctorremulac3, May 28 2012

       Benzene! For use in oxygen bars!
Check with your doctor if benzene is right for you.
UnaBubba, May 28 2012

       This is all well and good but how will you ensure that the 'random' items are truly random?
DrBob, May 29 2012

       A Reimann Zeta Function formula could be printed on the backing.
Alterother, May 29 2012

xenzag, Jun 06 2024

       Brilliant! [+]
doctorremulac3, Jun 06 2024

       Free from over 99.99999% of chemical compounds.
sonam, Jun 09 2024


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