Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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"Outdoor" Office

Grass, trees, filing cabinets
  [vote for,

Having previously pooh-poohed half's idea for bringing some much-needed grass into the office environment, I think it is only fair to present my own alternative.

Which is, to replace the bricks and mortar of the modern squat office block with a huge glasshouse. Then replace the awful gray plaid carpet squares with grass and the cubicle walls with bushes and trees. And since, to keep the same square footage, the office building will now take all the space where the parking lot used to be, we'd better add an underground garage.

Everything will have to be watered by an automatic in-ground system - sprinklers might be fun for the interns, but they'd play havoc with accounting's paperwork.

• *everyone* gets a window office - just look up
• you can walk barefoot on the grass just going to the water cooler (on casual Fridays, at least)
• trees are great sound absorbers and besides, they're good for the soul
• when the weather was suitably clement, the sliding walls at the ends could be opened up and cool gentle breezes could waft through the entire space
• you don't have to log onto weather.com to find out if it's raining
• the cars are tucked safely out of the elements
• you don't have to worry about remembering to water that funny little plant that Flo in personnel gave you - you can just plant it behind the waste basket
• you can bring your pet tree frog to work

Of course, we'd install smooth paving slabs immediately under your desk, so your roll chair could still roll (I don't think they work so well on grass).

DrCurry, Apr 27 2003

solardome http://www.solardom...sic-domes/index.php
Pricey but stunning [sufc, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

nettles and arthritis. its a funny old world http://news.bbc.co....i/health/771563.stm
[po, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Amorphophallus titanum http://news.bbc.co....sci/tech/410763.stm
Useful if you need to leave the office early [Klaatu, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]


       Great, except that I'll have to commute from the city to the country.
snarfyguy, Apr 27 2003

       Fishbone, simply because I will fishbone any idea that deters you from actually going outside and running barefoot through the grass.   

       (Not really, but I was sort of obliged to post that. Instincts and all that stuff.)
bristolz, Apr 27 2003


       - Leaves in the keyboard.
- Spiders in the CPU. (bbzzzzZZZZZZZT!)
- Trimming the hedges behind your desk.
- Losing your pet tree frog in accounting.
Cedar Park, Apr 27 2003

       Transparency? (I know you didn’t say it, but none the less, that’s why I’m laughing). Croissant.
Shz, Apr 27 2003

       yay! anything that makes the outdoors more accessible to lazy asses such as myself...+.

not that i work...
igirl, Apr 27 2003

       This is a cool idea! If there's someone that you can't stand in the office, all you'd have to do is plant kudzu in their shrubbery-enclosed cubicle on friday night, and by monday they wouldn't be able to find their desk.
robophobic, Apr 27 2003

       Do you depreciate your plants as assets, even though they are growing and worth more the larger they get?
Cedar Park, Apr 28 2003

       You'll need pathways to prevent the whole place from turning into a quagmire.   

       Heck- why not just bring your laptop to the beach/ forrest/ hills?
FloridaManatee, Apr 28 2003

       actually, *do* use the stinging nettles, not to wipe, but to soothe your seized-up joints after a sedentary day at the desk. Can't remember where I heard it, but apparently nettles are good for arthritis.
badgers, Apr 28 2003

       Wiggling my toes in my grass under my desk = +
Don Quixote, Apr 28 2003

       Welcome to the Office of Eden. As a perk, you get all the fruit you can eat. Just stay away from that tree over there in the middle. (+)
half, Apr 28 2003

       half: ah, that one's the Executive Tree.
bris: can't complain, but I will anyway.
DrCurry, Apr 28 2003

       There could be a whole new brand of office pranks...planting poison ivy, moving where the sprinkler points to, etc.
AJCrowley, Apr 28 2003

       the thing is..............you'd probably end up having a tarp put over the top, because the whole point of a glasshouse is to heat up the inside for plants or something............yep. the glass acts like sort of barrier and keeps in the heat...that's why they're popular where it snows.   

       therefore it would be way hot and the ac would be breaking all the time because of the huge amount of inneficciency. so thus the tarp.
politiquefiction, May 10 2004

       I you build it with a dome, you can use the "cooling machine" effect to build in some natural AC. Can't find a website, but trust me, it works. Basically you open a hole in the top of the dome, and open holes all around the bottom perimeter. Higher-altitude (therefore typically cooler) air is drawn in through the hole in the top and circulates out the holes in the bottom. This is all a totally passive inherent property of domes, so no machinery of any kind is needed. In real-world expiriments this effect has been shown to maintain an average temperature as much as 5-10 degrees F lower than the outdoor temperature at ground level.
5th Earth, May 10 2004

       Could be some issues with wildlife wandering in and out, though. Birds nesting on your desk and such. On second thought, that could be lots of fun. Imagine all the great ways to annoy your boss. Oh, I'm sorry, I lost that memo when the deer got in last week. I think one ate it.
elven_pixie, May 11 2004

       I write this seated on an outdoor planter, laptop on my knees. The glare on the screen and my eyes dilation make it impossible to work.
geo8rge, Mar 22 2006

       I really love this even though I have many plants surrounding my desk at work anyway, and people always say it looks as though I'm sitting in the jungle! I'd take it further....
xandram, Mar 22 2006

       Great idea! In the summertime, employees can be encouraged to wear swimsuits, and just may end up spending more time at work!
ProblemSolver, Mar 30 2006


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