Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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'Good God It's Monday's

Accountants love the atmosphere here...
  (+22, -4)(+22, -4)
(+22, -4)
  [vote for,

In the spirit of combining Ed Debevic's and TGIFriday's™, I offer 'Good God It's Monday's, for when you don't feel like eating at a flamboyant theme restaurant filled with junk nailed to the walls and perky staff with 20,000 buttons on their baseball cap.

You're greeted by Ben Stein, who asks you to sign, in triplicate, a 5-page waiver in case the coffee is too hot, the food is too bland, or the music too boring. The waitresses wear black mourning veils, the waiters all wear conservative suits. Every table is at a booth, essentially beige cubicle office furniture. The background music features the top three selections from 'Elevator's Greatest Hits,' which are played over and over again.

Specials include 'the Burger with a hint of ketchup and pickles,' Frozen 'Fish Sticks and Chips,' and for the truly adventurous, 'Grilled Velveeta,' (for legal reasons we cannot call it cheese). The soup of the day is Cabbage, every day, and the pies are for display only.

It's the perfect place to take 1. that annoying client you would rather like to lose, 2. your mother-in-law, 3. a really bad date, or 4. your coworkers on your last day of eating out together. Here's the real draw: if you call ahead, 'selectively bad' food can be made to order ahead of time for the target victim(s), while you enjoy your rather bland, but much more normal meal.

Bon appetit!

RayfordSteele, May 23 2002

Ed DeBevic's http://www.dailybru...01/ae.debevics.html
Service with not quite a smile... [RayfordSteele, May 23 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Beth's Cafe http://www.beansidh...ttle/eats.html#beth
on aurora in seattle. comes real close. home of the twelve egg omelet. everything is budget cafe style. bland bland bland, and the staff couldn't care less. [changokun, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]


       I'm pretty sure that I've been to several branches of this restaurant chain in many different cities...
yamahito, May 23 2002

       Yeah, I think it's TGIFriday's masquerading under a different name. I was on a business trip in 1999 and ate at one in New Jersey. I got a TGIF margarita, I think it was, and it looked like a foamy, icy Yoohoo with lots of salt around the rim. Kinda tasted like it, too, except for the tequila. I don't know why they didn't just call it a Yoohoola or a Margaroohoola. Anyway, it sucked. A lot. The food was all these warmed up frozen snacks available in your grocer's freezer that you don't mind paying $1.29 a box for, but not $12.95. I also had the shits from it. I had to walk across a 4-lane highway in the snow at 2:30 am to a mini mart the size of a tollbooth for Pepto-Bismol, which they didn't have, of course. Then I went back to the motel and received a phone call from some guy who'd been watching me and wanted to come to my room...wait a minute. Maybe the whole state of New Jersey should be called "Good God, It's Monday's".
dysfunktionalC, Jul 12 2003

       Entertaining anno, [dysfunktionalc].   

       The only TGIF I have ever eaten at was in London. Don't remember what I thought of it, really.
bristolz, Jul 12 2003

       Like George Carlin's idea for HSIOW, or "Holy Shit It's Only Wednesday", because "people would drink a lot more liquor if they thought it was Wednesday all the time."
jivetalkinrobot, Aug 11 2003

       There's a popular and cheap chinese place in Soho (that's Soho, London not SoHo, NY) called Wong Kei's. The food is lovely but the waiters are bastards, serious bastards. This ranges from   

       "How long will my food take?"   

       "Shut up!"   

       to an incident I witnessed where an unsuspecting tourist was evicted for asking for a different table. People keep coming back.
wagster, Oct 11 2004

       Well, good service is almost a regular in restaurants, when good foods (really good ones) are hard to find. I think that's what happens in Wong Kei's, [wags].   

       I like the idea, but the business in a restaurant consists not on bringing new customers all the time, but on making the few you have return over and over. I don't think anyone would be in need of a Good God it's Monday's more than once a year, if any. You can't bring your in law's more than once because they'll figure out your trick.
Pericles, Oct 11 2004

       Wouldn't the crowd just skip over Mondays and go to Tuesdays. They have a better salad bar and tilapia specials.
sartep, Oct 13 2004

       "shut up!" -ha! [wagster] do you know if they're hiring?
jaksplat, Dec 18 2004

       The thing I like about Wong Kei's, aside from the fantastic food/price ratio, and the name (it's Wonky's really isn't it) is the fact they have three toilets: Ladies, Gentlemen, and Women. Who uses the Womens?
Belfry, Dec 19 2004

       Holy Cow! - I haven't been to ol' Womg Kei for years!.
gnomethang, Dec 19 2004

       [bris] I went there too only last year and it's terrible !
neilp, Dec 19 2004

       [bris] The only TGIF I've eaten in was in Geneva - the Swiss really don't enter into that whacky, frenzied persona the TGIF waiters are supposed to have.

Re: Won Kei's and other restaurants known for the high level of abuse - we used to live near Nancy Lam's restaurant in south London. We went there once and then about three months later we were walking past on the other side of the road and she came out and shouted "Hey, why you no fucking come to my restaurant any more?". Great restaurant though.
hippo, Dec 19 2004

       I have gone to Wong Kei style resturants before. Those kinds of places are both crazy, insane and strangely amusing. Like the Bakery! I once went to a place where everyone spoke in short, loud, sentences and acted like stereotypes. Even the customers, lest they get kicked out. This was my order:   

       Waiter: What you want?   

       Me: Ribs!   

       Waiter: Ribs fo fools!   

       Me: You a fool!   

       Waiter: How's the weather, fool?   

       Me: It's gonna rain!   

       Waiter: Here yo fool ribs!   

       Me: Thanks, fool!
Shadow Phoenix, Oct 21 2007



       ....no kiddin'.
squeak, Oct 22 2007

       My sister works at a joes crab shack where they do this to a lesser extent. I believe their theme is just to be annoying. If you go there for a birthday they make you put on a mask (I've also seen someone have to wear a toilet seat) and walk a lap around the restaurant.
bleh, Oct 22 2007

       I can get this kind of abuse at home.
Noexit, Oct 22 2007

       Yeah, there is a Dick's in Chicago, apparently they have big wet napkin fights and whatnot. I read some review by people who tried to complain, and the manager told them to stop being babies and he didn't care about their complaint. I am totally going soon.
rascalraidex, Oct 22 2007

       And at the Elbow Room Cafe in Vancouver...   

       Typical conversation:
"Waiter, I'd like more coffee, please"
"Well then, get off yer butt and get it yourself! It's right over there. And pour some for table 3 while you're up."

       It's called "A Little Diner With A Lot Of Attitude"
Canuck, Oct 23 2007

       Wonder if you could just have a table at a restaurant that does this?
doctorremulac3, Apr 22 2024

Voice, Apr 22 2024

       [dysfunktionalc] created an account circa 2003, annotated on this and three other ideas, and was never heard from again.
normzone, Apr 25 2024


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