Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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hunger solving ostrich

third world hunger solving machina (ostrich operated)
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The common ostrich has one of the best conversion rates for food input to meat output. My idea is for a mobile ostrich processing plant. It is the ideal solution to ending world hunger and once up and running requires no further input. It (the mini mobile factory) can be drawn along by a team of ostriches (given that each ostrich produces around eight to ten kw of useable energy a team of fifty ought to yield 750 kw-1000 hp) -excess power could be drawn off via a generator linked to the wheels thereby negating the need for an outside fuel/power source, as the ostriches can browse on twigs, berries and grubs as they run. And god knows they love to run!

Within the factory there is contained a hatchery, slaugterhouse and accomodation for a multi skilled process person(note the ngs pc reference. yes i am a snag arent i) to remove the eggs that the ostriches lay along the way and move the required ammount to the hatchery. Fifty eggs a day ought to leave quite a few surplus to breeding stock requirements so the surplus can go straight to food reserves. The process worker will also be responsible for preparing birds for bbq-ing/roasting.

Given that you are breeding fifty birds a day or thereabout it will leave plenty to harness up to pull the factory along, as well as enough to feed every starving person in need of an ostrich drumstick. yum.

the dog's breakfast, Mar 06 2007


       So just run that by me again, exactly how does dragging a factory behind some ostriches solve world hunger?   

       Also, what's a ngs, and what's a snag?   

       And what do the ostriches eat?
zen_tom, Mar 06 2007

       the dog's breakfast?
theleopard, Mar 06 2007

       make lots of em-makes lots food nongendrespcific sensitivenewageguy
the dog's breakfast, Mar 06 2007

       twigs berries bugs
the dog's breakfast, Mar 06 2007

       Here's my concern. In areas of drought and famine, there are few berries, bugs and twigs to spare, causing a reduction in production just at the time where it's needed most. I don't think I need to point out that this could constitute a bit of a flaw.   

       That's if I'm correct in thinking that the reason for making the factories mobile is to deliver them into areas where they are most needed. If that's not the reason, then why are the factories mobile?
zen_tom, Mar 06 2007

       //And what do the ostriches eat?// sand.
xenzag, Mar 06 2007

       Ten kilowatt ostriches? You do realise that a large horse only produces about 750w?   

       And, well, 50 x 10 = 500kW, not 750kW? Even if you had these magic super-strength ostriches that can continuously put out 10kW, you're still not getting the power you're expecting.   

       As [zen_tom] points out, you need a lot of food to feed the fifty ostriches you've got pulling the factory, plus the (50 per day x 365 days or so for them to reach slaughter weight) = about 18,000 ostriches.   

       Such a quantity of food is not available in areas of famine. What is needed in such areas is rice or grain; this has an even higher conversion efficiency of nutrients to food.
david_scothern, Mar 06 2007

       /given that each ostrich produces around eight to ten kw of useable energy/   

       You cannot be serious. Link please.   

       Do you have any idea how many twigs, berries and bugs an ostrich would have to eat in order to put out that kind of power? Consider the mega calorie pasta mountains that cyclists chow through in order to scrape together a few hundred Watts.
Texticle, Mar 06 2007

       //given that each ostrich produces around eight to ten kw of useable energy//   

       I was about to point out that this was bollocks, but two people have already pointed this out. However, I see no harm in pointing out again.   

       Incidentally, *why* exactly is the dog breakfast?
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 06 2007

       My experience with ostrich meat leads me to consider it unfit for human comsumption. I have yet to find a stringier, tougher, and more tasteless food product.   

       I'd rather convert the twigs, berries, and bugs into food for myself.   

       I also suspect that your NGS PC ostritchperson will be chronically overworked. The mobility apparently is to ensure that the ostritches have new food sources each day, but I would not expect that herding 18,000 or so ostritches around on a daily basis would be possible for one person, even with the most advanced ostritch-herding and slaughtering techniques.
ye_river_xiv, Mar 06 2007

       Train a select few ostriches to herd the rest. I assume ostriches can be herded (unlike cats and hermits).
Texticle, Mar 06 2007

       //I assume ostriches can be herded// All the one's I've listened to were pretty quiet.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 06 2007

       Once you draw them out of their shells, you can't shut them up.
Texticle, Mar 07 2007

       I've never been able to draw ostriches.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 07 2007

       I didn't know ostriches had shells: Is this special 10kW species a shellfish with a confusing name?
TheLightsAreOnBut, Mar 07 2007

       Dear max I am occasionally 'all over the place like the dog's breakfast' thought it was nicer than 'all over the place like a mad woman's shit'; herded-hahaha; am too slow on the uptake to get the draw them bit. dear lights are on, ostriches dont have shells but their skin can be used to make excellent leather! finally david southern. David, David, David, I didn't bother doing the maths on the figures that just sprang into my head, 1000 hp just sounded too nice not to include!
the dog's breakfast, Mar 07 2007

       Scothern. sorry dave.
the dog's breakfast, Mar 07 2007

       Do you have any idea how many ostriches would be needed to produce 50 eggs per day? I do.
angel, Mar 07 2007

       Wouldn't free range ostriches be more efficient? Certainly more entertaining.
Noexit, Mar 07 2007

       This idea will never fly.
Jinbish, Mar 07 2007

       Ah - so the breakfast belongs to the dog (the dog's breakfast), rather than the dog *being* breakfast (the dog's breakfast). All is now clear.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 08 2007

       How about people who live in a land with no food move the heck away?   

       I don't think that it is my responsibility to save people from their own stupidity.   

       Generally when the food leaves you leave with it.   

       What is the difference between starving where you are and starving while you are walking to where the food is?   

       (hint: if you are walking to where the food is then you probalby won't be starving anymore)
twinkletoes1218, Mar 20 2008


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