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iPad Vulcan Mind Probe

talk to the brightness beyond.
  [vote for,

When Spock deployed the Vulcan MInd Probe in episodes of Star Trek, he placed all of his fingers on the head of the person into who's mind he was searching.

When I am using my iPad, like I am right now, I would like to able to perform a similar action at any time in order to carry out a sort of spiritually deep contact information search. This would mean the generation of a new finger control for the device, consisting of the placing all ten digits on the upper surface simultaneously then moving them around gently in a Spock like gesture of adjustment.

This new guesture would instantly activate a search for hidden information and communications buried in the recesses of the internet by connecting you to a network of A.I. devices which exist in various research facilities. The results would be unpredictable but always startling. These are the direct opposite of what is called The Dark Net. We will call them The Brightness Beyond and the iPad Vulcan Mind Probe is the doorway to instant access for all.

Lifting off the fingers would instantly return the iPad to its former state, with whatever previous work or pages still in place as if nothing had happened, except the memory of having been in contact with The Brightness Beyond.

xenzag, Apr 23 2016

Kollos https://en.wikipedi..._Truth_No_Beauty%3F
... except that iOS lacks any "inner beauty"; hideous on the outside, hideous on the inside too. [8th of 7, Apr 24 2016]


       You're not going to get any "spiritual depth" out of contact with an iPrat. Better try Ouija board...   

       Owning any apple product just screams "fashion victim !".
8th of 7, Apr 23 2016

       Actually the description you were looking for was 'envy'.
xenzag, Apr 23 2016

       // user //   

       There's your problem, right there. SysAdmins don't have issues - only lusers.   

       At least you're very successfully making the case for more of them to be culled.   

       // the description you were looking for was 'envy'. //   

       Hah, like envying someone's artificial leg ...
8th of 7, Apr 23 2016

       I have a love-hate relationship with our iPad. Needs more memory. Needs multiple account capability. Needs a file manager. Excellent execution of most things but Android typing logic have them beat.
RayfordSteele, Apr 23 2016

       You could pilot this concept with an image of the Horta. Then when you put your fingers on it you could screw up your face and groan "pain!". The incandescent beauty of the Horta plan is that one need not down load the app. It does not, however, get you into any buried recesses.
bungston, Apr 24 2016

       // The incandescent beauty of the Horta plan //   

       Horta ? You're talking about iOS here ... Ambassador Kollos would be a far better analogy.   

8th of 7, Apr 24 2016

       // Probably less infuriating //   

       That's an amazing sales pitch, [IT] ... ever tried flogging double glazing, or second-hand cars ?
8th of 7, Apr 24 2016


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