Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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random request store

"thank you for calling, may i help you"
  (+15, -2)(+15, -2)
(+15, -2)
  [vote for,

ok, so i work in retail. atleast once a day i get a completely random request having nothing to do with what we actually sell at my place of business (its a music store, we sell guitars and such). for example, yesterday a gentleman came in to the store and asked "do you guys have anything made of coral?" bewildered, i responded with a stunned "huh?" he said "you know that stuff reefs are made of in the ocean" i told him we couldnt help him and he left. so finially i get to the idea.

an empty storefront can be established, nothing but a desk with some computers and a few guys. this is the store that you go to for all the stupid crap that nobody actually carries. the store will become dealers of small jobber (multi manufacturer) catalogs and the like. essentially, you come in to the store, place a random request with the attendant, and recieve a response in a timely manner as to how long it will take, or if it is available. there is no overhead since you dont actually have to stock anything.

finially, the name of the store will be "thank you for calling, may i help you" so that before the salesperson is bewildered by a stupid request, the customer will be confused by the greeting "thank you for calling 'thank you for calling, may i help you,' may i help you"

bleh, Feb 04 2006


       Good idea, but I don't like calling people who want instruments made from coral "stupid".
sninctown, Feb 04 2006

       Cool. Now that you have your new job at the new store, you get a stupid request, and attempt to fill the order. You call your top vendor. You tell him where you're calling from. Long pause. Click.
lurch, Feb 05 2006

       This would not only be good for stupid stuff like the coral musical instrument but also for anything that people just dont know where to look or where to find it- like electrical outlets that come in colors other than white, ivory, brown, black, and grey. I would love to have a red electrical outlet. Maybe I can call "Thank You for Calling, May I Help You?"
Jscotty, Feb 05 2006

       Also I think the name a shop-name of "Sorry but we are closed" would be able to cause as much confusion - although it lacks the nice property of repeating the phrase.   

monojohnny, Jun 06 2006

       I could totally use something like this for those times when I need something like a conversion hose to use a vacuum pump (originally designed for R12) to evacuate air out of an empty R134 automotive air conditioning system. Even better, a glass wedding cake topper shaped like a mallard duck.   

       BTW, instruments made from coral are baked. Watch the Disney film "The Little Mermaid". I believe there was a harp and several pieces in a percussion section made from coral.
ed, Jun 06 2006

       //instruments made from coral are baked. Watch the Disney film "The Little Mermaid".//   

       "The Little Mermaid" was actually a complex CIA hoax intended to convince the USSR that the USA had gone "undah da sea." The "coral" instruments were actually made from desert rocks photographed in blue light.
akgeo, Jun 06 2006

       //I would love to have a red electrical outlet.// [Jscotty], By convention, electrical outlets are color coded. Orange, for instance, means that the outlet is attached to an isolated ground. You see these in places where sensitive electronics are plugged in.   

       Red ones mean that they are connected to emergency power.
zigness, Jun 06 2006

       Can't this store just be an online front to the "internet?"   

       Like if it doesn't actually sell anything, you can just charge them for the time they use on your computer like 10/hr and an additional 10 dollar fee to receive items (in addition to tax and shipping).   

       I think its a good item....i will call it "Ebay front"
compatta, Jun 06 2006

       "The Little Mermaid" is a cartoon (not real), and all the sounds from the musical instruments were actually recorded sounds from regular musical instruments.
BJS, Jun 06 2006

       i agree with [sninctown], although there must be a way to call people being guilty of thinking WTCTTISITMWIBNIIWR, even if they're not halfbakers.   

       The idea is great. the perfect gift-raw-material shop. [+]
sweet, Jun 06 2006

       this reminds me of someone that called the stationery shop I worked at as a youth. "Good morning, WH Smith (name of shop), how can I help" (shop worker)
"It's alright thanks, I'm just browsing" (caller).
neilp, Jun 06 2006

       I have a very pretty coral trombone, [bleh]. Have you any strings for it?
methinksnot, Jun 06 2006


       You could hire ex-hookers as salespeople...they're mostly quite attractive, and all have ample experiance with random requests.
shinobi, Jun 07 2006

       + Got churn?   

       I have to do this, I got a call yesterday from some lady looking for a jewish musical instrument made out of a seashell (i cant remember the name). who would stock this kind of stuff?
bleh, Oct 16 2006

       //By convention, electrical outlets are color coded.// [zigness] , I am certain of this but I do not know where you can buy them.. but this company would be able to find out.
Jscotty, Oct 19 2006


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