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Art Conkers All

Hang "art" pieces & bash them together
  [vote for,

Inspired by [xenzag]s many "conker" ideas, I came up with another.
Basically, choose two pieces of "art" (the bigger & more "expensive", the better), hang them on ropes from a bridge or something, then bash them together until one or both are smashed. Bonus points if you can get one impaled by the other.
For example, a Christo (which already includes rope, so won't look out-of-place) & a Pollock (generally large, so good target). At the end when they are smashed/impaled, it's still "art", so nobody loses!
neutrinos_shadow, Oct 07 2021

Fabergé conkers Faberg_e9_20conkers
[Loris, Oct 07 2021]

More artistic combat https://dronelife.c...rsue-illegal-kites/
plus: where it all ends [Condiment, Oct 11 2021]


       Each artwork destroyed is relegated to the dustbin, while the victorious artwork (bearing battle scars) gains prestige and also becomes more valued as an artwork and so its price tag would rise proportionately.
pocmloc, Oct 07 2021

       Ha - there are bigger pieces than this to work with. I'll take Michael Heizer's 400 ton boulder at La Brea Tar pits in Los Angeles as my conker. Those other works are flimsy items (you may reconsider their purpose when you check on their value on the open market)
xenzag, Oct 07 2021

       Agreed. The heads of statues would be excellent. Mount Rushmore here we come! Ha
xenzag, Oct 07 2021

       One section of Banksy bridge smashed against another would be cool.   

       Suspend the artists on the ends of the ropes with their works handcuffed to them (to prevent them dropping the artwork). Then swing the artists so they collide into each other. Do they use the artwork to protect their heads, or their heads to protect their work? Find out after this message from our sponsors!
pocmloc, Oct 11 2021

       Brings to mind the fighting kits of Pakistan.   

       Unrelated: If corporations got involved this could be a brilliant tax evasion strategy. Purchase a body of work from an artist, sell 1-2 pieces at exorbitant prices and re-appraise the lot as being worth 100s of millions. Then send your works to the bridge for an exhibition match and write down the capital losses, win or lose.
Condiment, Oct 11 2021

       Donate arbitrarily appraised art as a tax dodge? Nah, that will never catch on.
Voice, Oct 12 2021

       use non PC unwanted statues.
po, Oct 12 2021

       Well at first I didn’t want to see art destroyed, the other annos made me see it could be fun. So I’d like to see the Statue of Liberty vs the Eiffel Tower.   

xandram, Oct 12 2021

       What can be destroyed, can be rebuilt (heavier and with a stronger surface)
pocmloc, Oct 12 2021

       You think smashing things together to destroy them is a fun and good idea? I concur.   

       NO! Wait..not ME! I said 'I concur' not 'I conker'. Aaaaahhh
AusCan531, Oct 12 2021

       Count me in. +++++
blissmiss, Oct 13 2021

       //Count me in// OK [Bliss], sit on the edge of the bridge while we tie this rope around your tummy. Breathe in... Excellent.
pocmloc, Oct 13 2021

       ^Clever compliment [pocmloc]
wjt, Oct 23 2021


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