Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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In a category far, far away, someone posted a crossword clue which is, as far as I can tell, bogus. It was "Bertrand oddly revolves".

As far as I can establish, there is no plausible solution to this clue. In a cryptic crossword, you would expect the answer to be either "Brrn" (the odd letters of Bertrand), or possibly an anagram of "Bertrand", or equally "Rsel" or an anagram of "Russell". But none of those answers means "revolves". Or it might be that the odd letters (or an anagram) of "Revolves" is the surname of a famous Bertrand, but again this is not the case. Hence there is no plausible solution.

However, there is perhaps a game to be had in contriving plausible explanations linking random cryptic clues to arbitrary solutions. For example, given the above clue ("Bertrand oddly revolves") and the solution ("orbits"), can one find a way from clue to solution, in keeping with the conventions of cryptic crosswords?

Points would be awarded for the contender who comes up with the least convoluted and most convincing route from clue to solution.

MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 02 2012

A mismatched clue/answer pair from the SMH https://www.reddit...._but_merchandise_9/
Mentioned in my anno [notexactly, Jun 27 2019]


       Wow - [Simpleton] wins the first round hands down.   

       8 across: "Hollow ungulate lacks footwear". Answer: "resonant".
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 03 2012

       Step 1: When I read this post I thought of the word "eccentric."   

       Step 2: When I think of the word "eccentric," bakers in the HB come to mind.   

       Step 3: When I think of reasons why the word hasn't been mentioned yet by the aforementioned bakers, I think of Einstein's quote, "...Fish will be the last to discover water..."   

       Step 4: See Step 1.   

       <GROG now caught in endless loop. Move along please. Nothing to see here.>
Grogster, Nov 03 2012

       Head is spinning. Please make it stop.
blissmiss, Nov 03 2012

       Bertrand Piccard, solo global circumnavigational balloonist, followed an eccentric course due to the semi-parabolic path of the Jet Stream. That's my bid.
Alterother, Nov 03 2012

       Sometimes if I'm lying in bed late at night I'll think of a random word and try to come up with a satisfying crossword clue for it. Last night I came up with:

Messy attic reorganised methodically (10)
hippo, Nov 06 2012

       I appear to have missed the first solution for the clue/answer pair that inspired this idea. What was it?   

       In exchange for that answer I hope to receive, I offer this one: Systematically.   

       And to replace that opportunity, I offer this clue whose concept I've had rattling around in my head for a year or two waiting to be let out: "Consider food vendor's action to scold" (10)   

       But that's just a regular cryptic clue without the answer, so I also offer this clue/answer pair to find a link between: "Paddles the boat among the trees" / "sugarcanes".   

       "Hollow ungulate lacks footwear" / "resonant" is still open too, AFAICT.
notexactly, Jun 21 2019

       What about all the other solved letters? Using the big picture, the crossword puzzle is the clue because some author's clues can occasionally be slightly off.
wjt, Jun 21 2019

       //Hollow ungulate lacks footwear//   

       Trojanr ?
FlyingToaster, Jun 22 2019

       //Hollow ungulate lacks footwear//   


       //Hollow ungulate lacks footwear//   

       Deep Cehi.
wjt, Jun 22 2019

       One from the SMH [link]: Pantheon contains nothing but merchandise / warmonger
notexactly, Jun 27 2019


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