Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Bouncy Mosque

Inflatable mosque for more enjoyable worship
  (+11)(+11)
(+11)
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Mosques have something in common with bouncy castles: you have to remove your shoes before entering. Why not take advantage of this almost certainly divinely authorised coincidence and combine the two?

It would surely improve the image of Islam as a joyless, repressive throwback to a more violent age if you could check your shoes in at the door and praise Allah by way of having a good bounce in an inflatable musalla, complete with bobbing minarets, while reciting passages from the Quran. An enormous bouncy temple in Mecca would make undertaking your mandatory pilgrimage considerably more enjoyable as you bounce with millions of your brethren, while the Dome of the Rock could simply be deflated along with other inflatable places of worship during times of religious strife and re-inflated once the danger has passed.

TheBamforth, Aug 14 2019

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       Prejudiced, insensitive, offensive, blasphemous.   

       [+]
8th of 7, Aug 14 2019
  

       Brilliant. You could do a little yogic flying while you were there too. Or is that the other lot?
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 14 2019
  

       Excellent
hippo, Aug 14 2019
  

       The 8th wonder of the world.
RayfordSteele, Aug 14 2019
  

       //the image of Islam as a joyless, repressive throwback to a more violent age// Well, there's no doubt that that's the image it projects. I have very good muslim friends (particularly in Malaysia, one of my favourite countries; but also here in the UK), but there is no doubt that Islam in practice has some issues.   

       Christianity seems to have done a little better in updating to the modern world, and maybe it's because christians brought out a revised edition of the bible. Old-testament christianity is pretty primitive, but with v2.0 available there's little excuse to follow the v1.0 instructions. Maybe it's time for someone to write the New Koran, and probably the New Talmud while they're at it. It would also be an opportunity to update the menus a little, now that pork is generally safe to eat.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 15 2019
  

       Yes, that's true of course. But my point was that islam has a much more active, violent and vocal fundamentalist segment than other religions at the moment. There are fundamentalist christians, but they seem mostly to just rant and vote. There are fundamentalist jews, but they seem content with strange hairstyles and wearing prayer-boxes on their foreheads. I'm sure there are fundamentalist hindus, shintoists and pastafarians too. But islam has produced fundamentalists who are more worrying altogether.   

       If you can point me to another religion that has produced so many violent fundamentalists in the last 40 years, I will stand corrected.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 15 2019
  

       Yes, but when people have made their minds (if any) up, it's wrong to confuse them with actual facts.
8th of 7, Aug 15 2019
  

       // the population-to-death ratio remains easily with the Irish// Hmm. Well, to some extent I do indeed stand corrected. Although I'd point out that a lot of those statistics go back to the 1970s - outside my 40 year window. It's also worth mentioning that those figures are for the UK, and particularly for Ireland/Nornarn. Taken over the whole world, I don't think they'd show the same trend.   

       But you're right about things like mass shootings, especially in the US. I hadn't thought of them as terrorism, but of course they are - fair point. On the other hand, they're not often done in the name of any religion.   

       But then we come to the "lots of wars in muslim countries". I don't think you can claim that they're not related to islam, if you also want to consider Irish terrorism. In both cases, religion may be only an excuse or be one aspect of a more general division, but it's a factor.   

       So, on balance I still say that more modern terrorism is associated with islam than with any other religion.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 15 2019
  

       Allah Oop!
AusCan531, Aug 15 2019
  

       I would guess that the DWP are the foremost terrorist organisation in the UK. Recent news article showed DWP giving the CAB and another organization 51 million quid, with the rider they would never criticise the DWP...
not_morrison_rm, Aug 16 2019
  

       I would guess that the DWP are the foremost terrorist organisation in the UK. Recent news article showed DWP giving the CAB and another organization 51 million quid, with the rider they would never criticise the DWP...
not_morrison_rm, Aug 16 2019
  

       Islam is a social/political force just like Capitalism/Communism, one of the world's most powerful global movements, has no special right to be respected and can be fairly judged by its own mandatory Quranic teachings and rules without having to go into terrorism, which was not mentioned, or Muslims as people, few of whom chose to be Muslim, who were not mentioned.   

       Islam dictates a long list of 'haram' activities, including diet and dress code, and in some interpretations forbidding the playing of musical instruments or depicting living things (Joyless).   

       Islam places men in charge women and strictly forbids Muslims from changing their religious beliefs or being homosexual, punishing accordingly (Repressive).   

       Muhammad was a warlord who bought and sold slaves, kept women as booty, assassinated and tortured critics, stole property and waged offensive battles. In Islam, Muhammad is the “ideal human being” who Muslims must strive to emulate. That he was just one of many of his time is useful to know when trying to square his lifestyle with modern values.   

       I have non-believing Muslims in my own family since Islam rules that a non- Muslim (man) cannot marry a Muslim (woman) and has to convert; Islam dictates who you are and are not allowed to fall in love with (see Repressive).
TheBamforth, Aug 16 2019
  

       //Muhammad was a warlord who bought and sold slaves, kept women as booty, assassinated and tortured critics, stole property and waged offensive battles.// Yes, but he had his bad side too.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 16 2019
  

       I always had doubts about Tesco.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 16 2019
  

       You clearly put a lot of care into writing the above and I commend you for it.   

       The judgement call is exactly how able you feel people are to recognise nuance (such as the difference between philosophical musings and hatred, institutions and people), and how you balance positive effects (which are impossible to measure) with the risk of misinterpretation. Timing and context are everything. Once, Christians protested Jesus Christ Superstar and Life of Brian, now, all of us, Christians included, are richer for them (unless you really hate musicals). Humour and silliness is always the best tactic for change. I choose my words carefully.
TheBamforth, Aug 16 2019
  

       //You clearly put a lot of care into writing the above and I commend you for it. // I did, thanks.   

       So, you're saying the solution may come in the form of Halal Dolly? Maybe Allah Mia? Well, I can vote for that.   

       Which reminds me. If memory serves me right, John Cleese was attacked by Malcolm Muggeridge for Life of Brian. Salman Rushdie had a fatwa set by Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini. Only one of those warranted police protection.   

       Inexplicably, Andrew Lloyd Webber does not appear to have been threatened by anyone.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 16 2019
  

       As John Cleese said: "four hundred years ago, we would have been burnt for this film. Now, I'm suggesting that we've made an advance."   

       Islam is 600 years younger than Christianity. I'd suggest that a lot more recently they would have needed police protection. Progress occurred thanks to people gradually speaking up and daring to risk causing offence.
TheBamforth, Aug 16 2019
  

       Damn. I hate it when someone posts a considered and rational argument.   

       There's no doubt that hostility against minorities is more prominent now than for some time, and that is of course to be abhorred. However, there is also some truth in saying that islam is more problematic than any other religion. As far as I can tell, there is no specifically jewish, christian or hindu movement which is as aggressive as the radical side of islam, on a global scale. It's not at all one sided, but islam seems to lead the field.   

       There's also the fact that, whilst the vast majority of muslims are peaceable and reasonable and easy-going, the strict interpretation of islam has some inherent issues that are incompatible with the broader understanding of human rights. One of those issues is that it's a non-voluntary religion: you're born muslim and, at least in theory and often in practice, you can't leave. Another issue is that predominantly muslim countries tend not to be secular, and the punishments/restrictions imposed by islam often have the force of law. I was shocked to find that, even in Malaysia (which I consider to be fairly developed and had expected to be secular), sharia law applies to muslims. This sort of thing is simply incompatible with the 21st century notions of equality, personal freedom and personal choice. More broadly (and without a huge depth of knowledge to back me up), it seems to me that islam today is largely where christianity (and maybe judaism - I don't know) were a few hundred years ago.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 17 2019
  

       ^ Tells me, I just imagined a bouncy praise Allah wave of Muslim sujud rippling around the mosque like some wave table experiment. Everyone with youthful joy on their faces.   

       Religion was a there to help societies out when the heart was a bit stronger than the mind. We're still getting there, some hearts are stronger than others.
wjt, Aug 17 2019
  

       There is a problem with stereotyping. However, there is also a conflict coming sooner or later. Fundamentally, islam is set against the values that are on the rise globally - viz an increased demand for religious freedom, human rights and secularism. Either islam has to adapt, or the world has to, and I know where my money is.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 17 2019
  

       ... but you can't tell us, because the tax authorities might read this.
pertinax, Aug 18 2019
  

       I see no difference between the ethos of Islam and that of Catholicism. Both are equally idiotic, oppressive, divisive, dangerous and the source of violence and misery.
xenzag, Aug 18 2019
  

       That's not completely unfair. On the other hand, my understanding is that you can decide to quit catholicism if you choose.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 18 2019
  

       Maybe of Catholicism of a hundred or so years ago.
RayfordSteele, Aug 19 2019
  

       Oddly enough, of the three religions Christianity, Judaism and Islam, only one has a directive "be nice to the other religions". Which is it?   

       Not to mention Buddhism, which somewhere in sutras is a "whoever denigrates the Buddha spirit will have the head broken into seven pieces"...can't help thinking an even number of fractures is probably easier?
not_morrison_rm, Aug 19 2019
  

       //would be to liberal the fuck out of it// and how do we do that? Spreading Western ideas doesn't seem to be the whole answer - people are happy to adopt mobile phones and fast food yet still profess to despise the decadent, godless West.   

       I suspect your general philosophy is right, but it's not clear how you implement it.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 19 2019
  

       // Collectively, we're the counter to those shadowy, isolate corners - we have the light, we just have to keep it shining. //   

       Mmmmmno. I don't think we are.   

       I refer you to a very important passage in H G Wells' "Open Conspiracy", from the beginning of the thirteenth chapter. I would draw your attention in particular to the last sentence. It's very important advice.   

       'WE have dealt in the preceding two chapters with great classes and assemblages of human beings as, in the mass, likely to be more or less antagonistic to the Open Conspiracy, and it has been difficult in those chapters to avoid the implication that "we," some sort of circle round the writer, were aloof from these obstructive and hostile multitudes, and ourselves entirely identified with the Open Conspiracy. But neither are these multitudes so definitely against, nor those who are with us so entirely for, the Open Conspiracy to establish a world community as the writer, in his desire for clearness and contrast and with an all too human disposition perhaps towards plain ego-centred combative issues, has been led to represent. There is no "we," and there can be no "we," in possession of the Open Conspiracy.'
pertinax, Aug 20 2019
  

       //of the three religions Christianity, Judaism and Islam, only one has a directive "be nice to the other religions". Which is it?//   

       I'm not sure which one you're thinking of but all three supply such a gesture, though they are vague, very hard to find and obviously all contradict themselves elsewhere multiple times:   

       Christianity: The parable of the good Samaritan - Luke 10:30–37   

       Islam: Unto you your religion, and unto me my religion. - 109:6   

       Judaism: For all people will walk every one in the name of his god, and we will walk in the name of the LORD our God - Micah 4:3-5
TheBamforth, Aug 20 2019
  

       //This is why the Islamic faith is unreformable// You just never know what music the kids will get a hold of.
wjt, Aug 24 2019
  
      
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