Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Canon Canning

OCD-compliant canning standard.
  [vote for,

I'm a soda junkie. Can't get enough Coke and RC cola. I love the sight of neat, orderly, uniform rows of soda cans lining my refrigerator shelves. Like an army of goodness... ah.

But wait! Despite my best efforts, they cannot possibly be aligned in a perfectly uniform formation! Oh sure, the Soldiers of Sweet wear identical uniforms, but to get the designs on the cans to line up just right, the drinking spouts all point different ways! I cannot have my Contingents of Coke and RC Regiments lollygagging about, facing every which way and chatting with one another in complete disregard of the Uniform Code of Confectionary Justice!

Yet my only other alternative is to have their uniforms out of alignment, because they come out of the canning factory looking as if they dressed in the dark! Every spout points a different direction in relation to the logos on the can... WHY!!!???

For a nominal fee, I would be willing to order cases of perfectly, uniformly aligned soda cans, with the spouts pointed straight at the center of the company logo on the front of the can, shipped straight from the factory to my doorstep. With factory-direct prices, it would probably still be cheaper than retail, too. Come on... I know I'm not alone here.

21 Quest, Nov 21 2009

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       Thanks for the plus, Brigadier Bunner.
21 Quest, Nov 21 2009

       I am so glad to know I'm not the only person botherd by this. [+]
gisho, Nov 21 2009

       this is symptomatic of something....
WcW, Nov 22 2009

       //this is symptomatic of something....//

       Did you read the summary bar?
21 Quest, Nov 22 2009

       Thanks for introducing me to something that didn't bug me one whit before now.


       What [bigsleep] & [2 fries] said. Bun.
jtp, Nov 22 2009

       Fearful symmetry ... [+]
8th of 7, Nov 22 2009

       Immortal hand or eye?
zeno, Nov 22 2009

       This is a dangerous idea. If it were to succeed, it would strengthen a falsity that should lose, not win - ie: this is as bad as creationism.

       If you get your way here, you'll only be further submerged into your false impression that you have any control at all over your life, the things you're faced in your life, and the validity of the world model that you've built that you think resembles the life out there that you interact with. It will make you think that your actions have a direct mechanical transference to real-world results out there in reality where in fact there is no such direct linkage. It will promote the idea that you're in control of your life whereas there's absolutely nothing more than resonant coincidence that makes it seem that what you do affects what life happens. It will strengthen your opinion that you're right about things when of course nobody can be if we're not "in" life but merely pushing the cats paw to interact with it.

       When life doesn't go your way, it will even be more of a calamity then, and you won't be able to reconcile that disillusionment. Because of this.
Ian Tindale, Nov 22 2009

       savannah fire extinguisher?
pocmloc, Nov 22 2009

       <Dark Star>

       "[IT], return to the bomb bay ..."

       </Dark Star>
8th of 7, Nov 22 2009

       Ian...didn't you say the exact same thing about 21's last idea ;-)
blissmiss, Nov 22 2009

       One more "n" and this idea would *really* be interesting.
DrWorm, Nov 22 2009

       Yeah, I know. Couldn't think of a way to present that one, though.
21 Quest, Nov 22 2009

       I'm just curious... why the bones?
21 Quest, Nov 23 2009

       I was expecting something about camera manufacturing and Hong Kong law enforcement -

       Canon Caning
normzone, Nov 23 2009

       How 'bout cannon caning? Crime fighting just got a whole lot meaner.
21 Quest, Nov 24 2009

       Congratulations, you have found an unmet, unrecognized need. Do you know how rare that is? May I suggest the obvious name for your venture--the Anal Can Corporation.
ldischler, Nov 24 2009

       No... that would be way too open to misinterpretation. WAY too open.
21 Quest, Nov 25 2009


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