Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Car that goes 'bang!' and all the doors fall off.

And back again.
  (+35, -1)(+35, -1)(+35, -1)
(+35, -1)
  [vote for,

Car modification that simulates that ancient crap-car gag. Upon taking the keys out of the ignition the car ignites a small quantity of gunpowder out of a faux exhaust at the back with a satisfyingly sudden bang! and a plume of smoke.

Then the doors fall off, or seem to. They are actually designed just to open downwards, but swiftly, as if with gravity.

Finally the hydraulics kick in, first slumping over the front left wheel, and then all of the others collapse at once. The wheels on the axles tilt outwards at the same time to seem like they have been disjointed from the axle. The icing is the bonnet wrenching open and a puff of white smoke emanating from somewhere in the engine.

When you want to leave the hydraulics push back up, the bonnet shuts, the wheels realign, and the doors lift back in to position.

Good for rocking up at swanky parties, for people who don't like door handles, to irritate hotel doormen and for naked apiarists.

theleopard, Sep 04 2007

Houston's art cars http://www.orangeshow.org/artcar.html
[theleopard, Sep 04 2007]

crash dummie toys on ebay http://cgi.ebay.com...19181QQcmdZViewItem
[dentworth, Sep 04 2007]

For [k_sra]... Dishwashing_20Liqui...0Bubble_20Dispenser
Because it was a naked bee-keeper who gave me the idea. [theleopard, Sep 04 2007]

Explosive Body Panels Explosive_20Body_20Panels
kinda halfbaked [discontinuuity, Sep 04 2007]

Time to reconsider the rustproofing? http://youtube.com/watch?v=WMDz8SwNWoA
A TV commercial for Canadian Tire (aka Crappy Tire) [Canuck, Sep 05 2007]


       There is an... entity known as an "Art Car" native to the Houston metropolis. I think this would be a very successful example.
GutPunchLullabies, Sep 04 2007

       Would also go down well at Burning Man, I imagine.
DrCurry, Sep 04 2007

       This would be the bitchinest camero at burning man if it ran on biodiesel or recycled birkinstocks or hemp seeds and stems or something.
Galbinus_Caeli, Sep 04 2007

       Why is this under Home-Kitchen-Sink?
phundug, Sep 04 2007

       I'd like to see the doors actually separate from the car, could be a simple spring loaded latch that lets go, doors can be re hung and the spring reloaded like the toy, crash dummies/ cars.
dentworth, Sep 04 2007

       Ooops... hold on a sec [phundug]...
theleopard, Sep 04 2007

theleopard, Sep 04 2007

       why didn't I think of this?
theNakedApiarist, Sep 04 2007

       Would anyone care to defend the bakidity of this for me, because I'm having trouble.   

       (That sentence is one of those moments when I could really do with one of those half-question marks...)   

       <scampers off to anno the appropriate idea>
theleopard, Sep 04 2007

xandram, Sep 04 2007

       [xandram], how many times have I asked you not to do handstands at your desk?
theleopard, Sep 04 2007

       At least not while wearing that skirt.
Galbinus_Caeli, Sep 04 2007

       ha, you guys.
Usually they say, "could you pick up that pencil on the floor?"
or this croissant? +
xandram, Sep 04 2007

       When does a performance piece become a terrorist act?
Noexit, Sep 04 2007

       Wow, that's going to be some punch line.
GutPunchLullabies, Sep 04 2007

       so this is just for effect? not a theft deterrant?   

       why only naked bee-keepers?
k_sra, Sep 04 2007

       [xandram] Think of the children! I'll be over here trying to think about baseball.
Galbinus_Caeli, Sep 04 2007

       //theft deterrent//   

       It could be a theft deterrent, sure, just leave collapsed and no-one would bother touching it. You'd have to take your stereo out, but everyone does that already.
theleopard, Sep 04 2007

       <drinking now> misreading things like: baked knee-beepers
theft detergents
looking for the answer to :When does a performance piece become a terrorist act?
ans: When their act makes it to Broadway.
[GutPunch] waiting in line for some punch.

       and [G_C] in a baseball cap... oh heck, I might as well be driving one of these cars, too.
xandram, Sep 04 2007

       //theft detergents//   

       <Laughs entirely too loud, shocking the dog, neice and sister>   

       Then spend an hour explaining the bakery to them and why a car that goes boom and all the doors fall off is a great idea.   


       (and thank you [x])
evilpenguin, Sep 05 2007

       Is this getting close to what you mean? (see link)
Canuck, Sep 05 2007

       Makes me think of the SNL commercial for the 'Lexus Chameleon XLE'... tried to find a video of it, but I failed miserably. The premise was brilliant, though. Lexus on the inside, 72 Ford LTD 2 on the outside. Theft deterrent by way of just looking crappy. Included optional theft deterrent system, which when the button was pressed on the key fob made the whole car shudder, half-collapse and appear as though a wheel had fallen off. Anyone else remember that? Still, similar but different. I like it.
gus_webb, Sep 05 2007

       Great link [Canuck]
you're welcome [evil]- I should sometimes repay the wonderful folks who having me laughing so hard, too.
xandram, Sep 05 2007

       //who having me laughing//   

       dearie, are you drunk or foreign? or both?
k_sra, Sep 05 2007

       Easy, [k_sra]; we're all foreigners here (though not all foreign to the same set of countries).
pertinax, Sep 06 2007

       [21] only bones this because he skipped the annos. That's what I think.
globaltourniquet, Sep 06 2007

       [k_sra] oops, that one was early morning, sometimes the same as being drunk. I won't fix it now, but thanks for making me laugh at myself.
xandram, Sep 06 2007

       [xandram], i completely understand. [pertinax], i meant foreign to the language, of course. i'll be more specific next time. : P
k_sra, Sep 06 2007

       btw, I have always wanted to be *foreign*.
I also cannot get very drunk anymore, as I have Type 1 diabetes and have to limit myself to two drinks. Sometimes with uneven blood sugar levels, it causes me to be *tipsy* without drinking.
xandram, Sep 06 2007

       hmmm, you *are* foreign, [xan], as [impertinax] pointed out, you just have to go elsewhere to get it. and i have the same alcohol tolerance point as you. two max, but thankfully i don't have the diabetes to contend with. i guess i won't be sending you a chocolate pudding cake for christmas after all. : (
k_sra, Sep 06 2007

       Just for the record, since we're talking about a chocolate pudding cake here; I *don't* have diabetes.
zen_tom, Sep 06 2007

       MERRY CHRISTMAS!! = )
k_sra, Sep 06 2007

       Better than the doors opening up [21]. Have you not seen the Back To The Future series? How many times does either Doc Emmet Brown or Marty McFly bang their head getting out of the Delorean?   

       Despite the fact that neither of us have ever counted, or indeed are likely to, I'm sure you'll agree the facts speak for themselves.   

       Is there any cake left?
theleopard, Sep 06 2007

       I understand from Sacha Baron Cohen that the best way to appear foreign is to grow a mustache and never clean your suit.
Galbinus_Caeli, Sep 06 2007

       +1 great idea Def Lep
po, Nov 25 2008

       Actually the best way to look foreign is to grow a suit (wool) and never clean your mustache.
Spacecoyote, Nov 25 2008


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