Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Chippendale Bike

introduce your bike to the decorative wonder of Chippendale Furniture
(+1, -1)
  [vote for,

Most modern bikes are mass produced shiny metal and plastic affairs. As such they are totally characterless and devoid of any individual craftmanship.

Chippendale Bike solves this problem by introducing some hand made components, such as carefully hand carved spokes or lathe turned pieces for the frame. It's easier just to view the illustration as one example.

xenzag, Mar 09 2020

Chippendale Bike https://sodabred.tu...y-xenzag-932020-you
[xenzag, Mar 09 2020]

Chippendale Furniture examples http://www.winterth...chippendale-at-300/
[xenzag, Mar 09 2020]

Chippendales https://en.wikipedi...g/wiki/Chippendales
Potential riders [pocmloc, Mar 09 2020]

Make your own bamboo bicycle https://www.bamboobicycleclub.org/
[hippo, Mar 09 2020]

Biscuit joiner https://en.wikipedi...wiki/Biscuit_joiner
Very useful, though not usually for bicycle thieves. [8th of 7, Mar 09 2020]

Bleeding_20Bicycle_...(Wasp_20Attracting) [xenzag, Mar 09 2020]


       // mass produced shiny metal and plastic affairs. As such they are totally characterless and devoid of any individual craftmanship. //   

       <Directs Special Hard Stare at [xen]/>   

       We know when we're being got at. At least we can get spares for our systems.
8th of 7, Mar 09 2020

       There are plenty of individually hand-crafted bikes available to purchase on the open market, but they tend to cost a lot more than the cheap mass-produced ones.
pocmloc, Mar 09 2020

       Most definitely not what I expected, sadly.
blissmiss, Mar 09 2020

       Most definitely not what I expected, gladly.
FlyingToaster, Mar 09 2020

       Someone at my cycling club has an exquisitely hand-made part-wood, part-steel bicycle frame, in which the top tube and seat stays are made of a single, curved piece of wood. This has a hole in it to let the seat tube poke through, and the back end of it is split into two to make the seat stays. Definitely a one-off.

Also, see link.
hippo, Mar 09 2020

       Muscular bike frame, special seats. Scented oil on the chain.
Voice, Mar 09 2020

       Who is it exactly who goes round sniffing bike chains ? Sniffing steam locomotives, yes. Sniffing aero engines, yes. Motorbikes ... just maybe. But bicycle chains ... ? (Asking for a friend).
8th of 7, Mar 09 2020

       Theft would be relatively trivial, 30 seconds with a Jr hacksaw and you can whip a 10mm section out of the frame to pass the lock through, put the section back in, duct tape and ride away. When you get a little more time, you can repair the section with some small bow-tie repairs and epoxy.
bs0u0155, Mar 09 2020

       Actually, you can get those neat biscuit-joint cutters <link> quite cheaply now. They make a beautiful clean slot, and a joint fixed with PVA and clamped for 24 hours is immensely strong.   

       You might not even have to cut out a section; there may be enough give in the end-joints or the wood itself to ease the lock through, particularly if it's displaced side ways. Only one cut needed.   

       How you subsequently retain ownership of said bike is more of a challenge.
8th of 7, Mar 09 2020

       I invented a lock that's under pressure, so that if you cut through it, you get dosed with a nasty chemical. The same idea could be applied to the entire frame. (link)
xenzag, Mar 09 2020


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