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Commercially Viable Television Coverage for Undead Marathons

Just How Long Is This Going To Take?
  (+6, -1)
(+6, -1)
  [vote for,

One of the thorny problems for network executives in deciding to cover a sport is how much airtime will it take to cover it. Zombie marathons, and indeed other undead sporting events, take an excruciatingly long time because they don't move so fast. Rigor mortis and all that. So, these events have never drawn coverage.

I propose that zombie sporting events CAN be covered by network television through time lapse photography. This way the networks can precisely time the events to facilitate the inclusion of the necessary commercial advertising interruptions. This may also open up a whole new demographic for advertising purposes. (Unless, of course, it is discovered that the audience consists of the exact same people that watch pro wrestling...)

Grogster, Oct 20 2010

Lurch for the Cure http://www.zombieri...aign.org/lurch.html
Closest thing to a zombie marathon I'm aware of. [MechE, Oct 20 2010]

Some Music to Go Along With The Event... http://www.youtube....?v=afldH1gkkCw&NR=1
This guy is freaking amazing... the music starts about 24 seconds in... this is probably the part where they detour through the sushi restaraunt. [Grogster, Oct 21 2010]


       Well, it's certainly true that there isn't much coverage of undead sports nowadays. I've searched all through the TV listings and haven't found any at all this week.

The problem with the time-lapse idea is that it would preclude live (?) coverage. So, if a zombie suddenly veered off the marathon course and ran into, say, a local school then you would probably have heard about it on the news already rather than getting to see the carnage, panic, bloodshed and violence as it happens which, for me, is the essence of undead sports.
DrBob, Oct 20 2010

       Well, [DrBob], you could make the time-lapse film in advance and then broadcast it speeded-up as it actually happens in real-time.
pocmloc, Oct 20 2010

       <Benny Hill theme music>
hippo, Oct 20 2010


       So you film a pre-enactment of the marathon, presumably with actors playing the parts of the zombies? Then you'd have to get the real zombies to generate exactly the same result that was filmed in the pre-enactment (including diversions through schools etc.)   

       OK then.
Twizz, Oct 20 2010

       hippo, you should post "Films with completely inappropriate mood music" as an idea.
DrBob, Oct 20 2010

       This might also work for cricket.
Loris, Oct 20 2010

       <link> for the music...
Grogster, Oct 21 2010

       Sounds like a cert for spread betting ...
8th of 7, Oct 21 2010


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