Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Curt Kobane reports

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News agency that provides very brief reports. In this case, the Kurds versus IS conflict.
not_morrison_rm, Oct 20 2014

Simplified news, for the elderly http://www.youtube....watch?v=Jj1W1r1V9TQ
[not_morrison_rm, Oct 21 2014]

Ticker TV Ticker_20TV_20Channel
[Cuit_au_Four, Oct 22 2014]


       If there's anything the world needs more of, it's a-contextual soundbite style news reporting.   

       What we could do with however, is ELI5 (explain like I'm 5) style news reporting. The challenge is to find a reporter who doesn't apply an appalling bias to their reports.
Custardguts, Oct 21 2014

       True, to both of the above...and what...nobody done the "PLEASE PLEASE STOP" joke yet? I have to do everything around here..
not_morrison_rm, Oct 21 2014

       Regrettably Kurt Persson, the journalist, died in 2004 as he would have been the ideal head reporter.   

       However, Curt Persson may be willing to step into his shoes, if I can get him to leave the Luleå University of Technology.   

       Ideally, every one in the business would be called Curt Persson.
not_morrison_rm, Oct 22 2014

       These reports would be very short and could be offloaded to an intern reporter. 'Yep. He's still dead.'   

       Not to be confused with Bain&co reports, which are probably lengthy and dull financial quarterlies.
RayfordSteele, Oct 22 2014

       I had the idea for a television news channel that delivers news using only scrolling "tickers."
Cuit_au_Four, Oct 22 2014


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