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Data plunger

for slow-loading web pages
  (+9, -2)
(+9, -2)
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Back when CRTs displayed only green or gray text, and it scrolled from bottom to top, I always wanted a hand crank on the side of the monitor to make it scroll faster.

These days, while waiting for web pages to load, I'd like a plunger (like the old dynamite detonation devices, but more stylish) mounted on top of the monitor, to "fwoosh" the data onto the screen faster.

How would it work? Wouldn't have to, really, as long as it made a nice fwooshing sound (or maybe a "zhhreeem") and gave you (or someone) the idea that there's something you can do besides sit there and be helpless.

beauxeault, May 28 2002

Windup hard disk http://www.halfbake...indup_20hard_20disk
reminded me of this idea. [beauxeault, May 28 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]


       Pedal faster!
phoenix, May 28 2002

       I'd quite like a one-arm-bandit style lever on the side of my computer as an alternative to the Return key. It would be extremely satisfying when embarking on a search - you would even feel justified in shouting something like "Take it away!".
stupop, May 28 2002

       With those trendy new Macs that have screens on a flexible pole, you should be able to slam the screen back or to the side to equal pressing enter, and it would return to its previous position when it was finished.
pottedstu, May 28 2002

       I'd get fed up pushig a plunger that did nothing. I'd rather it sent a report off to an organisation that recorded the link I was surfing and how long I'd been waiting for it to load. Croissant for being able to vent frustration, though.
st3f, May 28 2002

       One-armed bandits meet search engines... very nice. Perhaps it could involve a Babbage engine of some sort as well?
RayfordSteele, May 28 2002

       //Perhaps it could involve a Babbage engine of some sort as well?//   

       Whoa, let's not get too technical here!
NickTheGreat, May 28 2002

       If not here, where?
mcscotland, May 28 2002

       I think Rayford's right, a little mechanical co-processor to help with the really tricky calculations.
pottedstu, May 28 2002

       I'm stuck for the time being on my copper phone lines and 28.8 bps. I've noticed lately that banner ads have become more elaborate, thus, annoyingly, vastly slowing down navigation. Guess I should disable java script.
entremanure, May 29 2002

       I'm too lazy to smack a button; hence, automate the distraction so I'm not so bored.   

       If a web page is still loading 4.5 seconds after I click in -- my screensaver lights up, slowly at first, then moving quicker and interacting with the bits and pieces of its slow loading environment.
reensure, May 29 2002


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