Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Deer Rider

  (+12, -2)(+12, -2)
(+12, -2)
  [vote for,

This is a deer friendly deterrent system, the purpose is to keep them off your property and prevent them from eating your shrubs.

This is how it works you hire my company to send a gentle person that essentially hangs out, outside your home and when he sees a deer he attempts to ride it off your property.

The Deer Rider would set up a camera to document his various attempts to ride a deer. Deer Rider incorporated would own the rights to the video footage. In the event that the deer rider was able to successfully ride a deer the customer would not have to pay for that days deer riding services.

This would be more of a deer chasing service and this is good because it will teach deer to fear humans and humans to fear riding deer.

Deer Whispering techniques would be strictly prohibited.

vfrackis, Jan 23 2013

Deer chasing works both ways. http://2.bp.blogspo...203-deer+attack.jpg
[swimswim, Jan 23 2013]

Your argument is invalid... http://wtfcontent.c...mg/134989429364.jpg
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jan 23 2013]

badger http://theshroom.wo...ask-a-honey-badger/
[vfrackis, Jan 24 2013]


       The deer would REALLY fear humans if I ever got a ride on one. If it survived.
Kansan101, Jan 23 2013

       A bun, not so much for the idea itself (which would actually be illegal in my state; "terrorizing game and wildlife" is a ridiculously puny misdemeanor crime), but for what I thought it might be, and for the fresh round of jokes it will inevitably spawn.
Alterother, Jan 23 2013

       Oh deer, I was going to deride this idea then realized that would make me a derider thus substantiating the concept. Well played [vfrackis]. Well played. [+]
AusCan531, Jan 23 2013

       Devil take the hind, most.
UnaBubba, Jan 23 2013

       Deer Rider Inc could branch out and provide similar deterrent services for all manner of activities one wished to discourage, the common thread being the efforts of the Deer Rider, and the video.
bungston, Jan 23 2013

       Bungston what exactly did you have in mind?
vfrackis, Jan 24 2013

       Oh, riding squirrels; gerbils; guinea pigs...
UnaBubba, Jan 24 2013

       (Deer already injure more people than ALL other wild animals, combined. They are dangerous animals, not at all cuddly and friendly.)   

       "Thank you for calling the Fish and Game Department, my name is Bob. How can I help you?"   

       --"Thank goodness. I hope you can help me. The police and the highway department were just horrible."   

       "Oookay, I'll try to help, what seems to be the problem?"   

       --"It's the signs, you must take them down at once!"   

       "Uh- signs? What signs would those be?"   

       --"The deer crossing signs. You must take them down!"   

       "Why do you want the signs taken down?"   

       --"It isn't safe! They keep getting hit by cars! They mustn't cross there!"
whlanteigne, Jan 24 2013

       Will they also deal with unwanted badgers?
pocmloc, Jan 24 2013

       No such thing as an unwanted badger?
vfrackis, Jan 24 2013

       Yes yes, but do they do effleurage?
theleopard, Jan 24 2013

       This sounds like it would cost a lot of doe. Quite a few bucks.
phundug, Jan 24 2013

       It's like the only surefire way to get the cat to bugger off: walk towards it going "ooh, nice kitty, come here kitty" with outstretched arms.
FlyingToaster, Jan 25 2013

       I... I don't really know how to vote this one. Would the deer riding technician wear some protective clothing? Would they be fired if they didn't try to actually ride the deers and instead shooed them away? Would they be covered by insurance? Would they be allowed to wear bear costumes for efficiency? What if the deer tramples all the shrubs when fleeing from the scene? Who pays for that? What if the deer runs in front of a car while running away from the rider? Who pays for that?
PauloSargaco, Jan 25 2013

       The Deer Rider Services Group is not in control of any deer and makes no statement that it either seeks to control or is capable of controlling any such creature.   

       The Deer Rider Services Group would be exempt from any liability associated with any damages caused by a deer/acts of god.   

       I believe that Deer are responsible for their own behavior. Overreacting to stimuli in their immediate environment and then trampling bushes is an irresponsible deer behavior as is leaping in front of a moving vehicle.
vfrackis, Jan 25 2013

       [+] I like it and would like to apply for a position at your company!
xandram, Jan 25 2013

       What?!! Not liable for damages resulting from acts of god?!? The nerve! I hope they revoke your license, you... you... you're a very irresponsible person!
PauloSargaco, Jan 25 2013

       You know this only works if the rider is a midget in racing jockey uniform and colours.
FlyingToaster, Jan 25 2013

       This idea makes me horny. Okay, maybe not...
normzone, Jan 26 2013

       What [FlyingToaster] said. But that goes for just about any Halfbakery idea.
swimswim, Jan 26 2013

       So these deer riders would be indistinguishable from perverts. Your going to be giving them video camera equipment to record their deer riding while requiring them to //gentle person that essentially hangs out, outside your home //   

evilpenguin, Jan 26 2013

       Nothing about an insurance policy addendum for peoples living in rural regions with dense deer populations, then?
RayfordSteele, Jan 28 2013


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