Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Designer Device Grease

Handle devices and rub grease over them.
  (+11, -1)(+11, -1)
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Purchase these small expensive vials of variously coloured and multitudinously scented greases from your local retailer. Then with clean hands rub a few drops onto your mobile, tablet, mouse or any handheld device. Whether your preference is for a slippery, silky, or even grimy texture there is a Designer Device Grease for you.

However, Designer Device Grease is really for others. When someone borrows your item you can assure them that the substance has not been exuded from your own body, but purchased at great expense from a fashionable store. This will make their preceding gesture of revulsion seem gauche, and a social faux pas.

rcarty, Dec 24 2011

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       This is a level of inventive wierdness to which I can't even aspire. [+]
Alterother, Dec 24 2011
  
      
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