Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Dirt Fortified Infant Food

Branded range of infant food infused with non-toxic dirt
  (+7, -5)
(+7, -5)
  [vote for,

All kids eat dirt. I grew up on a diet of coal and soil. A mid morning snack would often consist of a strip of rubbery tar pulled from the middle of the street where the slabs of concrete roadway butted together. This stuff must be good for you, so why not build it in to a range of branded products in amounts guaranteed to satisfy any kid's desires? We could, for example have Farleys Rust for those who like to chew on crumbling drainpipes, and of course there would be Soil-a-Bix. I could go on - but do I need to?
xenzag, Sep 30 2005

geophagy http://geography.ab...aphy/a/geophagy.htm
[po, Sep 30 2005]

Perfect poop pill Perfect_20poop_20pill
One of my first ideas, damned, I think, by a poor name choice. But essentially the same concept as this. [bungston, Sep 30 2005]


       I recently read an article which expounded the theory that kids are pre-programmed to eat dirt so that they get exposed to bacteria , viruses and the like at an early age and so strengthen their immune system. If this dirt is going to be put in foodstuffs it would probably be sterilised, wouldn't it? Thus, removing any prophylactic advantages and all the fun.
squeak, Sep 30 2005

       I'm not quite sure why anyone would pay money to buy food contaminated with dirt when there is dirt in awesome abundance to be had for free all around us, but I agree that bringing up a child in too sterile an environment is not a good idea.
salachair, Sep 30 2005

       business idea: hire lactating women for nude mud-wrestling.   

       I can't believe I actually dignified this with a response.
dentworth, Sep 30 2005

       [squeak] I think the idea is to give the child an idea of the diversity of tastes and textures of dirt, as a means of encouraging them to go off and experiment with the wider world of grot and grime. [+]
[dentworth] But what a magnificent response it was.
coprocephalous, Sep 30 2005

       How about a series of dirt packets, each containing a known bacterium that anyone wanting to live long and propser should be immune to.   

       Should appeal to those mommies who don't especially want their liddle diddums picking up unknown bacilli.
DrCurry, Sep 30 2005

       My mother chewed tar in her youth. Apparently it’s yummy and an amazing teeth whitener. You can survive on dirt, if necessary. Here’s something I’ve always wondered (could be way off base on this): If you ate small quantities of dirt regularly, all your life, would you then have an appendix that wouldn’t go south on you because you are using it?
Shz, Sep 30 2005

       New Scientist had an article a few weeks back pointing out the low incidence of allergies among kids who grew up on farms, or near animals. Personally, I think there is something in the idea that eating dirt stimulates the immune system.   

       Presumably kids in urban areas don't have the same opportunites for getting their hands on clean, healthy dirt. Some way of getting muck (and preferably animals) to them (or vice versa) is important = but putting it into foodstuffs is likely to trigger a serious backlash. The whole food industry and its culture is based on getting things as sterile as possible - I foresee wider ructions as a result of this.   

       Alternatively, all supermarkets could be forced.... oooh..... the germ of an idea.
moomintroll, Sep 30 2005


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