h a l f b a k e r y
Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.
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Grouse shooting traditionally takes place outdoors*, where it
often cold, damp and lacking in amenities. Of course, one
does one's best to provide a hearty outdoorsy lunch at half-
time, but it can still be uncongenially chilly.
The Buchanan estate, however, has over the last few
been trialling drone grousing. Each drone carries a highly
modified shotgun and automated reloader. Each hunter
a suitable VR headset and communicates with their drone
the comfort of the Game Room in the main house, where
whisky and firesides are abundant. Retriever drones are on
standby to pick up and deliver the downed birds.
It does require some skill and practice, to be sure. We lost
quite a few drones to begin with, either due to careless
shooting or recoil. But things are getting more
into a groove now, and it's all proving to be jolly successful.
We did briefly try putting IR LEDs on the grouse and using
tracking software to make the aiming easier, but to be
we all thought it took away some of the fun, and besides
of the drones took out the TV remote control through the
Game Room window and made a bit of a mess of things.
(*turns out to be a wise choice)
||No, but plasterers are expensive these days and the punt-gun
has a surprising range.
||I thought the drones would substitute for grouse. No offense intended to the Collective.
||Thing is, grouse can be made quite cheaply.
||The usual purchase by nouveau riche, with indoor outdoor flow, could handle a punt gun. No plaster in sight.
||//nouveau// Well, we didn't open our first pineapple
plantation until 1544, it's true; but there was money in the
family well before that - even before the French had a word
||I didn't think you were of that ilk. With money, strange wants like shooting grouse indoors, would be possible. Drone grousing would be for the poor, huddled masses.
||I've tried shooting ilk, but to be honest they're too big a
target, and after the first few you run out of space in the
||Shipping might fit the need but those super container ships still have a limit for containers. Refrigerated or otherwise.
||The other problem is that you seldom see ilk at sea.
||Max, your jokes make me ilk