Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.

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Drone grousing

  [vote for,

Grouse shooting traditionally takes place outdoors*, where it is often cold, damp and lacking in amenities. Of course, one does one's best to provide a hearty outdoorsy lunch at half- time, but it can still be uncongenially chilly.

The Buchanan estate, however, has over the last few seasons been trialling drone grousing. Each drone carries a highly modified shotgun and automated reloader. Each hunter wears a suitable VR headset and communicates with their drone from the comfort of the Game Room in the main house, where whisky and firesides are abundant. Retriever drones are on standby to pick up and deliver the downed birds.

It does require some skill and practice, to be sure. We lost quite a few drones to begin with, either due to careless shooting or recoil. But things are getting more into a groove now, and it's all proving to be jolly successful.

We did briefly try putting IR LEDs on the grouse and using tracking software to make the aiming easier, but to be honest we all thought it took away some of the fun, and besides one of the drones took out the TV remote control through the Game Room window and made a bit of a mess of things.

(*turns out to be a wise choice)

MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 14 2019


       * Assets not big enough?
wjt, Nov 15 2019

       No, but plasterers are expensive these days and the punt-gun has a surprising range.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 15 2019

       I thought the drones would substitute for grouse. No offense intended to the Collective.
Voice, Nov 16 2019

       Thing is, grouse can be made quite cheaply.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 16 2019

       The usual purchase by nouveau riche, with indoor outdoor flow, could handle a punt gun. No plaster in sight.
wjt, Nov 16 2019

       //nouveau// Well, we didn't open our first pineapple plantation until 1544, it's true; but there was money in the family well before that - even before the French had a word for it.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 16 2019

       I didn't think you were of that ilk. With money, strange wants like shooting grouse indoors, would be possible. Drone grousing would be for the poor, huddled masses.
wjt, Nov 16 2019

       I've tried shooting ilk, but to be honest they're too big a target, and after the first few you run out of space in the freezer.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 16 2019

       Shipping might fit the need but those super container ships still have a limit for containers. Refrigerated or otherwise.
wjt, Nov 17 2019

       The other problem is that you seldom see ilk at sea.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 17 2019

       Max, your jokes make me ilk
Voice, Nov 17 2019


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