h a l f b a k e r y
Apply directly to forehead.
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This is an improved version of the traditional sandwich board,
where a person walks about as a mobile advert. Earverts are
specifically designed to work in crowded places were people
have to queue up or there is very free little space. They
consist of a hat with two wings projecting from each
ears, upon which the message is inscribed, so that it is visible
from both the front and the back. Electronic, illuminated or
animated messages are also possible. The messages are
intended to be read by the person or persons jammed
immediately behind or in front of the earvert carrier, in a
place of close confinement, like an elevator of moving stairs.
||pearverts - either advertisements on fruit, or sexual deviants with a fetish for petit-pois.
||As Van Gogh's beau said when she opened up *that* parcel...
What's this 'ere?
||print 'Half' on one ear and 'bakery' on the other.