Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Fat Detector

a friendly reminder that you're obese
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Alright. Here goes. I'm sure that our technology is sophisticated enough that we can calculate the volume of a person passing through someone, or even do a combination of a volume and weight scan to calculate the BMI of a passerby.

What I propose is this, similar to metal detectors that BEEP when you pass through with just a piece of tin foil in your pocket. Why can't we have a BMI detector that BEEPS when you're obese ? This is a health epidemic- a friendly reminder would encourage people to take action for their health.

Of course, the downside is that all that beeping is bound to drive a person MAD.

architerra, Mar 29 2003

Body Fat Analyzers http://www.bodytren...n306fatanalyzer.htm
Are entirely Baked, and built into most exercise machines. Go to the gym, yer lazy sod. [DrCurry, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Gut Control http://web.archive....a/Gutless_20America
Did better than this one, but still didn't make it into croissant territory, so you should probably retire in the face of the humorless. [DrCurry, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

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       Oh dear.Fatwa
sufc, Mar 30 2003
  

       Baked: The electronic door chime at a KFC?
Cedar Park, Mar 30 2003
  

       Good Idea!   

       (Goes to his lab to invent the Fat-Detector Jamming Device and Mirror Disabler. I'll make millions!)
ByteMarquis, Mar 30 2003
  

       "calculate the volume of a person passing through someone"?
RoboBust, Mar 30 2003
  

       It's ghost fat, for which a special ghost-fat detector is needed.
pluterday, Mar 30 2003
  

       This is needed, because an obese person clearly wouldn't have any other way of knowing.
waugsqueke, Mar 30 2003
  

       Can't identify satire, Dim?
waugsqueke, Mar 30 2003
  

       It's ghost satire, for which a special ghost-satire detector is needed.
pluterday, Mar 30 2003
  

       This would be a great thing to install anywhere, because people love to be reminded how fat they are. Perhaps they could make sounds when the handicapped or unattractive passed through as well.   

       Idiot.
dbsousa, Mar 31 2003
  

       We already have perfectly good devices to inform people of their physical dimensions.

What we don't have, though are useful devices to give people a friendly reminder that they are being offensive or stupid, to encourage them to take evasive action for their health. (heavy people know that they're heavy, but stupid people are... ignorant)

Of course, the downside is that all that beeping inside my head is bound to drive me INSANE.
roby, Mar 31 2003
  

       This is possibly the worst idea I've ever heard. And not just on the Halfbakery. No, I'm including such ideas as 'let's kill all the Jews, then life will be great' and 'investing in dot-coms is the safest bet.'   

       I wish I had some more fishbones.
sambwiches, Mar 31 2003
  

       No, Fat Tax is worse.
yamahito, Mar 31 2003
  

       [reensure] what?
igirl, Mar 31 2003
  

       I agree that Fat Tax is worse, but this idea is pretty damn dire. Here's a friendly reminder that you're a dick.
madradish, Apr 01 2003
  

       //sophisticated enough that we can calculate the volume of a person passing through someone//   

       What?!?!?
DesertFox, May 12 2004
  

       Pluterday already explained it.
ldischler, May 12 2004
  

       It's pluterday satire, for which a special pluterday-satire detector is needed.
k_sra, May 12 2004
  
      
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