Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Functional, communicative clothing

like action sounds for your computer, but with clothes
 
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Years ago, they thought it was going to catch on. Operating systems had "action sounds" for when you opened a folder or clicked on something. There are some regular sounds that are regularly incorporated into systems but usually are part of prompts or warnings. So it didn't really catch on with computers, but why not clothes!? Our society is increasingly trying to grab attention or become part of the background! Having this technology built into our clothes would be another way to express yourself. Electronic sensors would be sewn into your clothes and would send their signals to your phone, or a dedicated speaker. It would detect all your movements in their various speeds. Fully programmable, and with an entire market dedicated to this, whenever you moved, it would trigger a sound. If you ran, a siren sound would play, if you stopped suddenly, screeching tires! If you fall down, something comedic akin to cartoon sound effects. Celebrities could ensorse their own actions, for a premium of course: when you wave your hand good bye, a voice is heard of our governator, "I'll be back". If everybody had this system activated, it would be easier for blind people to flow with crowd on sidewalks. Obviously, for deaf people, it wouldn't be so interesting.
twitch, Sep 20 2010

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       //...for deaf people, it wouldn't be so interesting.//   

       A lot of us might wish we were deaf...those lucky bastards.
Boomershine, Sep 20 2010
  

       Drainpipe trousers will never sound the same again ...
8th of 7, Sep 21 2010
  

       Raises hands to ears.
infidel, Sep 21 2010
  

       //A lot of us might wish we were deaf...//   

       [infidel]//Raises hands to ears.//   

       See?
Boomershine, Sep 21 2010
  

       The user seems dedicated to making as much noise as possible, most of it about excreta.
infidel, Sep 21 2010
  

       //If you ran, a siren sound would play, if you stopped suddenly, screeching tires! //   

       I get the screeching tire sound...but, why would sirens sound when someone runs? Would the siren sound be followed by gunshot sounds, perchance?   

       Man, this is going to be a hoot for those blind people. And, don't underestimate the interest from the deaf. Once they see the blind folks diving for cover (which they can't see), I'd bet that the deaf will get a lot more interested.
Boomershine, Sep 21 2010
  
      
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