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Giraffe-Suit-O-Death euthanasia option

 
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Tired of life?

Can't be arsed to go to Switzerland?

Simply slip on this natty NMRM Co patented Giraffe-Suit-O-Death and then wander around any Danish zoo and go "oh dearie dearie me, oh me old hooves, they are killing me" or something like that.

not_morrison_rm, Feb 09 2014

Apparently giraffes aren't on the endangered species list... http://www.google.c...m=bv.61190604,d.aWc
...so a zoo kills a baby giraffe and feeds it to the lions. [FlyingToaster, Feb 11 2014]

Giraffe beer... http://www.williams...tles/seven-giraffes
[not_morrison_rm, Feb 11 2014]

[link]






       so, like "Be Fed To A Lion When I Die", but with a slightly different timeline, then.
FlyingToaster, Feb 09 2014
  

       So we let you into the zoo for free, but here's the catch...
FlyingToaster, Feb 09 2014
  

       That's not a zoo, more like the Hotel California, except you do get to leave as sashimi...
not_morrison_rm, Feb 10 2014
  

       I'm assuming this is a topical joke...
Alterother, Feb 11 2014
  

       ^ <link>
FlyingToaster, Feb 11 2014
  

       Aha, thank you. Too lazy to look it up myself.   

       What the zoo officials did makes perfectly good sense to me, but I have a somewhat unusual perspective on life and death. It's actually the same thing that happens in the wild, only expedited by human hands.
Alterother, Feb 11 2014
  

       I don't think lions, generally born and raised in captivity, should get used to eating anything that might be available for a midnight snack a few pens over.   

       They coulda had a fund-raising barbecue: what kind of beer goes with giraffe ?
FlyingToaster, Feb 11 2014
  

       A tallboy?
swimswim, Feb 11 2014
  

       Predictably, there is a giraffe beer..linky
not_morrison_rm, Feb 11 2014
  

       //        I don't think lions, generally born and raised in captivity, should get used to eating anything that might be available for a midnight snack a few pens over.    //   

       Instead they should eat corn-bred beef that's been half- rotted to break down enzymes that could make the big kitties sick and dusted with supplement powder to replace nutrients they would normally get from wild meat?   

       The captive bred giraffe had the potential to develop hip displasia andor several other debilitating condition, and therefore could not be used for breeding stock and would probably become sick shortly into adulthood. The zoo had no room for another giraffe. No other suitable home could be found for the giraffe.   

       Lions are expensive to feed.   

       Zoos around the world do this all the time with smaller, less high-public-profile animals. When Nature cannot cull weak animals from the herd, we must take that responsibility. It's a little ugly, but so is Nature.   

       Anybody seen the episode of Planet Earth where the baby penguins freeze to death in a blizzard? How about the episode where the caribou calf is torn apart by wolves? Or maybe the episode where the wildebeast gets eaten by the...   

       Well, this thing with the giraffe is exactly the same. I'm just glad they didn't waste the meat.
Alterother, Feb 12 2014
  

       Actually they did have a few offers for the thing, including somebody who offered almost half a mil (no clue why). Meanwhile I'm guessing your prepared beef was still cheaper than 2 years worth of zoo upkeep on a giraffe.   

       I'm mostly curious as to why they'd decide to make a production out of it, given that a fair portion of their income is probably from people who don't want to know about such things.
FlyingToaster, Feb 12 2014
  

       The public attendance does seem a bit weird.
Alterother, Feb 12 2014
  

       //where the baby penguins freeze to death in a blizzard   

       I set that to repeat..
not_morrison_rm, Feb 12 2014
  
      
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