Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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All the world's your local
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Many people would enjoy experiencing "the Norm reaction", this being the moment when you walk through the door of a bar or pub and everyone inside shrieks [YOUR NAME HERE]! You smile and before you've waddled to your customary seat, your favourite beverage is already lined up on the bar.

Personally, I would kill* for the Norm reaction, but I simply can't devote the time and finance required to generate it in the normal way (most of time and all of money spent in watering hole). Now with the new GlobaLocaBar system, there's another way.

A passive RFID chip installed on a card carried by the user records certain personal information. This is selectable by the carrier and might include:
-First name or Nickname
-Favourite drink
-Favourite sport and team
-Political allegiance
-Preferred snack and flavour of said.

When the user enters a bar an RFID reader extracts the information from the card and transmits it to a console at the bar. This allows the bartender to greet them in the appropriate manner ("Hey Doc, how's it going? Your rum with a rum chaser in a monkey skull's right here.")Whereas Norm only enjoys his hearty welcome on the way into "Cheers", users of this system would be greeted at any bar using the system.

The scheme is easy to opt into. Any boozehound wishing to opt in simply procures a card from the GlobaLocaBar organisation, any bar wishing to opt in, procures a reader and signs The Agreement.

The Agreement has a single clause which expressly prohibits the transferrence of any personal data from the GlobaLocaBar system to any third party. Any establishment found to be in violation of The Agreement must serve free drinks in perpetuity to the party whose details were leaked as well as to all employees of GlobaLocaBar.

*Insects, rodents, cats, irritating children, rogue elephants or bears.
DocBrown, Apr 19 2006


       It's a dog eat dog world out there Cliff and I'm wearing milkbone underwear.   

       Merely being recognized is not enough. You also have to be LIKED.
Galbinus_Caeli, Apr 19 2006

       Good point [Galb], but I'd argue that being recognised is a start. Reminds me of a good exchange from recent popular film "Pirates of the Carribean".
Commodore:"You are without doubt the worst pirate I have ever heard of."
Captain Jack Sparrow: "But you have heard of me."
DocBrown, Apr 19 2006

       Maybe if it also included indication of your typical tipping pattern.
Galbinus_Caeli, Apr 19 2006

       Ah, you must be Stateside. Here in the UK we drink too much for tipping to be viable.
DocBrown, Apr 19 2006

       Indeed, I am Ugly American Personified. Perhaps for non-tipping cultures it could include your in-pub and afterhours arrest record.
Galbinus_Caeli, Apr 19 2006

       Ha! That's more like it. I'm not sure the people who really should list that information would surrender it however.
DocBrown, Apr 19 2006

       Well then you have to fall back on the standard Teeth/Tattoos evaluation system.
Galbinus_Caeli, Apr 19 2006

       I get the "Norm!" reaction wherever I go.
normzone, Apr 19 2006

       Me too! But they preface it with "AB!"
Galbinus_Caeli, Apr 19 2006

       //Perhaps for non-tipping cultures// There are no non-tipping cultures, there are only some cultures that pay such low wages to serving staff that they rely on tips to get by.   

       And as much as I understand the need for a place where everybody knows your name, as much as I understand the need for a little fun, as much as I understand that drinking a beer or other alcoholic drink is really nice, I think it is best to keep in mind that spending so much time in the pub is unhealthy and that Norm and his buddies are alcoholics.-
zeno, Apr 20 2006

       [zeno] In what way is spending time in convivial company unhealthy?
Galbinus_Caeli, Apr 20 2006

       (looked up convivial) There is nothing wrong with that, once in while. What I am commenting on is spending almost every evening in the pub.
zeno, Apr 21 2006

       A local bar run by a motorcycle club, developed the tradition of patrons trying to punch out anyone coming into the bar through the front door. Locals used the side entrance. They did not sell a lot of beer to strangers.   

       Maybe a role playing club where you cosplay Norm, Clint, Frazer, or Diane or other celebs. Would be weird sitting in a bar with five Norm s and two Clint s some of whom were cross dressing.
popbottle, Oct 09 2013


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