Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
"Put it on a plate, son. You'll enjoy it more."

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.



Global warming in regards with a gentlemen's delicate bits

  (+2, -1)
(+2, -1)
  [vote for,

As we all know, it's going to get hotter....

If I might go so far to mention the two veg in the 'meat and two veg'

Right 3B,who sniggered? If you want to lose all your lunchtime..sorry, flashback

Anyway, the two veg are kept away from the body, because the little guys peg out when they get too hot.

According to my calculations, by the end of the century the two veg will have to be 2.96938885 metres from the body to be cool enough. I suspect either a) a cooling device will be on the markets or b) trousers will have to be radically redesigned.

not_morrison_rm, Oct 21 2019


8th of 7, Oct 21 2019

       bad science [-]
Voice, Oct 21 2019

       Bad, perhaps; painful, certainly ...
8th of 7, Oct 21 2019

       diamond heatsink for the family jewels.
FlyingToaster, Oct 21 2019

       "Fan it wiv yer 'at !", as the actress said to the bishop (allegedly).
8th of 7, Oct 21 2019

       Bad science, naughty science, get down Shep
not_morrison_rm, Oct 21 2019

       Hang on - you say there's only meant to be one meat?
MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 21 2019

       So I have another meter and a half to go, then...
RayfordSteele, Oct 21 2019

       Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Voice, Oct 21 2019

       ... although sea temperatures are rising, too ...
8th of 7, Oct 22 2019

       If things get too hot outside than testes will just evolve to remain internal where the temperature remains relatively constant... and those without the balls to accept change will no longer procreate.   

       The idea and comments are so very funny. But really, get used to it, women's boobs start sagging at sixty and from then on it's anyone's guess where they will end up. Knees, ankles, or worse. So button up and deal with it. Freeze your little fishy guys now, and be one step ahead of the game, and learn to love your, soon to be, droopy testies.
blissmiss, Oct 22 2019

       Happily, this has not proven to be an issue for any primate species, in, say, Africa
theircompetitor, Oct 22 2019

       <Contemplates amusing mental image of [n_m_rm] attempting scrotum-stretching experiments on an un-anaesthetized silverback lowland gorilla/>
8th of 7, Oct 22 2019

       //If things get too hot outside than testes will just evolve to remain internal//   

       I think it's more probable they would evolve further cooling strategies, like sweating constantly or flopping about for air cooling. But human testicles are a different story. We have three more generations before natural evolution in humans is a matter of history.
Voice, Oct 22 2019

       //testes will just evolve to remain internal where the temperature remains relatively constant// Apparently the main reason testicles are kept cool is so that the sperm can sense when they're in a nice warm vagina, and wake up and start swimming. If you testicles were always at 37°C, your sperm would be on constant standby which, allegedly, is not good for them. Like leaving your Ferrari ticking over for an hour before you head out to drive through the Holland tunnel.   

       On the other hand, you'd think sperm would be smart enough to find some other way of detecting when they're in a place worth swimming through.
MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 22 2019

       //scrotum-stretching experiments on an un-anaesthetized silverback lowland gorilla   

       I out-sourced that to Beanangel.....funny... I have not seen him in a while.   

       I know this is something of a tangent, but the new Japanese Emperor has pardoned 500,000 petty crimes. I am wondering if it was one bloke who forgot to return a library book on time and one bloke who committed 499,999 crimes?
not_morrison_rm, Oct 22 2019

       //something of a tangent// Not really. A tangent at least touches the line it's tangential to.
MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 22 2019

       <Files [m_m_rm]'s anno in "Useless fact of the week"/>   

       // three more generations before natural evolution in humans is a matter of history. //   

       That strikes us as overly optimistic. Nowhere near that long ... after all, the asteroid arrives in just ... oh, you don't know about that, do you ?
8th of 7, Oct 22 2019

       //lowland Gorilla//   

       Reminds me of a friend who, in an evolutionary biology lecture, asked whether there had been a comparative study of primate penis size. Embarrassed silence.   

       He’s now a professor at UCLA
Frankx, Oct 22 2019

       // Embarrassed silence //   

       Why ? It's simply a matter of scientific fact. It's not like asking every male there present to stand up and be counted (or rather, measured, hem hem).   

       In fact, it's a perfectly reasonable and indeed interesting question, despite its teenagers-sniggering-behind- the-bike-sheds aspect.
8th of 7, Oct 22 2019

       //near tbat ?   

       Didn't know the Cube had a Yorkshire dialect emulator..live and learn...
not_morrison_rm, Oct 22 2019

       But surely it's common knowledge? "Cardboard box?? Eeh, we used t'dream of livin' in't cardboard box." Hence the cube.
MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 22 2019

       //women's boobs start sagging at sixty// I've seen even smaller ones, down to a 43D, sag noticeably.
MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 22 2019

       It's acceptable to "notice". It's not acceptable to not only notice, but immediately approach the lady with a protractor, a tape measure, and a purposeful glint in your eye, when you haven't even been introduced.   

       // the Cube had a Yorkshire dialect emulator. //   

       A minor blip in the Universal Translator - now fixed. For obvious reasons, the system misidentified Yorkshire as a separate and distinct language rather than a dialect, since it lacks a number of constructions in normal English such as "It must be my round", "What a nice sunny day", and most significantly "Welcome, stranger".
8th of 7, Oct 22 2019


back: main index

business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle