Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Gnatcatcher Hat

Two birds do the job of a thousand hands
  [vote for,

A sombrero-style hat with a lightweight birdcage atop. Inside are a pair of gnatcatchers on a perch. The gnatcatchers work together ridding the immediate vicinity of gnats while the hat wearer labors ceaselessly behind a lawnmower.
whatrock, Jul 15 2016

Ahem Bat_20in_20the_20Hat
[21 Quest, Jul 16 2016]

and Frog_20Hat
[FlyingToaster, Jul 16 2016]

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       Oh, currently about two weeks worth.
whatrock, Jul 15 2016

       // How far behind? //   

       We recommended at least 15 metres for the man-portable backpack lawnmowers; and try to stay upwind as much as possible.   

       With vehicle-mounted lawnmowers, it's actually possible to get closer, because the armour provides protection from the heat, and modern armoured vehicles have closed-circuit air handling to protect against fumes and combustion products. But they're unsuitable for most gardens.   

       It's possible to deploy lawnmowing devices from aircraft, but again the targeting isn't that precise and can lead to a lot of collateral damage and adverse publicity.
8th of 7, Jul 15 2016

       // what sort of device are they? //   

       A gnatcatcher is a type of wren, i.e. a tiny bird, that dines on gnats. Gnats fly in a holding pattern above the head of a person outdoors before making suicide runs at the ears, nose or eyes. Upon death, replacement gnats take their place. This takes the joy out of mowing the lawn, a task that had little joy to begin with.   

       Bats [link] operate at night and frogs [link] must be kept wet.
whatrock, Jul 16 2016

       // This takes the joy out of mowing the lawn, a task that had little joy to begin with. //   

       Who could possibly not enjoy squirting a flaming jet of liquid hydrocarbons onto grass, and watching it frazzle ?
8th of 7, Jul 16 2016


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