h a l f b a k e r yStrap *this* to the back of your cat.
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In of one Pieter Bruegel the Elder's painting of 1569
"Wedding Dance in the Open Air" many figures are
meticulously depicted wrirlng around at a wedding
celebration.
It's just one example of the many thousands of paintings
throughout history that show large crowds of people,
their faces
staring out across the centuries being
carefully described in the days before photography.
"Here You Are in 1569" is the name given to a new image
search that will find a depiction of your face in one of
the multiples that have been carefully scanned and
digitised in a giant database.
Here's how it works You upload two well lit and
photographed pics of your head and face, front view and
profile. When the database finds the closest match
possible, you are invited to pay a small fee to receive a
reproduction of the original painting, with your face
highlighted, from within the midst of the others
depicted.
This will more than likely be contained in the work of
some obscure mid 18th century painting, but a few will
find themselves in a famous masterpiece like
Rembrandt's "The Nightwatch" or as a disciple seated at
one of the many versions of "The Last Supper".
You may of course find yourself gloriously resembling one
of Bosch's demons, but pehaps will be satisfied to appear
finely attired as a gentleman or lady in something like "A
Private View at the Royal Academy, 1881" by William
Powell Frith.
I was surprised to see no link
https://en.wikipedi...Royal_Academy,_1881 [pashute, Jul 11 2021]
(?) I was surprised to see no link
https://www.google....d+to+see+no+link%22 [pashute, Jul 11 2021]
https://lh3.googleu...nnualparissalon.jpg
[xenzag, Jul 12 2021]
Me_20And_20My_20Chicken
[xenzag, Jul 12 2021]
How to Use That Google App to Find Out What Piece of Art You Look Like
https://nymag.com/i...ks-like-selfie.html [xaviergisz, Jul 16 2021]
[link]
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I would be surprised if most people have such a match. Your search is limited to detailed paintings of human faces that still survive and have been digitally scanned. |
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Can I interest you in our very discrete VoiceCo alteration services? We can do the painting OR your face! Or both! |
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I would be equally surprised if many people don't
find a match though anyone of non-white ethnicity
may take a longer search. [see link of just one
painting of numerous examples depicting a sea of
faces] |
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[+] This can be extended to the faces which hold up brickwork and balconies, which would most likely make you related to Masons. |
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Here you are in Study after Velázquez's Portrait of Pope
Innocent X |
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Meant to include that this idea is partner to the
earlier one of finding a different kind of match.
[see link Me And My Chicken] |
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Clever idea, and very doable, considering the rapid evolution of facial recognition AI. |
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Standing around even for an hour in Everytown/village/hamlet, Canada, you can see family resemblances emerge. I'm sure our 'colonies' carry forward traits conserved over time, such that our snooty neighbour Cumberbund III's second cousin looks so much like [MaxB]'s Sturton, you just 'know' with whom Great^6 Aunt Tillie canoodled in the 1569 Summer of Love. |
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Failing to find a suitable likeness related to [Sgt]*, for example, another nominal nominal fee may be paid to 'insert' customer's face (see Deep Fake). |
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*We are informed that we are very likely 'one of a kind', 'they broke the mold', and so on. We are unclear if this is a compliment. You may have experienced the same compliment/slur, thus the upgrade option. |
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So "You, in some elses's Ancient Painting" |
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Whatever happened to You, in someone else's vacation
pictures" |
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//'they broke the mold'// |
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By "they", do you mean the Health & Safety staff, taking the mold
away in hazmat suits, placing it carefully in a metal press, and then
dissolving the fragments in hydrochloric acid? |
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(Someone has to be on Borg duty, right?). |
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Possibly, [pert]. I appreciate your carrying on the good works* of [8th] and [MB] where possible. |
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My birth was almost definitely attended by a Men In Black clean up crew, complete with neuralyzer to erase the memory that there was ever even a mold. |
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Whoops, I've said too much. |
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*good works = 'amusing, erudite smackdowns' |
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Another version of this could map the individual's pose or just their expressions against those found in great works (Judith doing her thing, Saturn munching, Truth clambering out her well), to allow participation by those whose faces don't resemble any face of a person who was back then regarded as sufficiently wealthy or interesting to get their picture did. |
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