Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Mutt Dog Show

Recognition for Breedless Beauties
  (+21, -3)(+21, -3)
(+21, -3)
  [vote for,

The way I see it, dog shows today are what Miss America would be if it weren't for the ACLU. They're exclusive, and judge the animals based on their pompous owners' habits and depth of pockets instead of intrinsic merit.

My idea is to start a series of Mutt shows, which would showcase things like personality, adorableness, and "obstacles overcome." More than just a doggy Special Olympics, these animals would compete in car chasing (maybe with a NASCAR tie-in or promotion with automaker) tail-wagging, pouncing, following children home, and begging for food. All of these are qualities dogs are supposed to have, dangit, and these snooty "legitimate" dog shows are missing the point.

There could be a category for mangiest, laziest, most flea-bitten, most likely to get run over, most likely to kill mailman, and most improved stray. Couples could compete in the Lady and the Tramp contest by seeing who can eat speghetti in the most attractive fashion.

After several years of shows, new non-breeds would begin to develop, but there would be a penalty for any dog that looks too much like any other dog. Both entrants' scores would be halved if, say, two dogs were alike, or thirded if three, etc.

This is my first halfbakery submission, and a new idea for me. You don't have to go easy on it, though, since there are plenty more where it came from.

OJCIT, May 02 2005

scruffs dog show http://news.bbc.co....ounties/3564736.stm
takes place every year. [po, May 02 2005]

(?) Corn dog http://www.thedrydo...fe.com/corndog3.jpg
Corn dogs are huge in the states. Of course, anything that could be described as "meat smothered in batter and deep fried" would probably do pretty well here. It's a batter dipped hot dog, deep fried to delicious golden brown perfection. Wienerschnitzel and Arctic Circle make the best corn dogs I've ever had. [AfroAssault, May 05 2005]


       Most importantly, since pedigree dogs are notoriously stupid, your show should definitely have a Most Intelligent category. Also an 'Ability to Tell Postman from Burglar' category would be good. I'll definitely be entering my pet sea urchin in the 'Most Unlike Any Other Dog' category.   

       Welcome to the HB! Great first idea, like it a lot.
moomintroll, May 02 2005

       I love this. Animal Planet would probably jump on this. (Strays, etc.). What a great idea. (I don't wanna see any echos like, "The rather ordinary Ms. America Pageant", etc.)   

       Uhm, hey po, l'll slip ya a fiver if ya lose the link...damm, damm, damm!
blissmiss, May 02 2005

       Same here [po]. In the event that I ever get any money...
froglet, May 02 2005

       blissy, accept my multiply invite and I will think about it...   

       nearly entered Dino one year!   

       sp: damn, damn.
po, May 02 2005

       lame excuse - the link stays...
po, May 02 2005

       And a croissant goes to this bastard son of a bitch.
baconbrain, May 03 2005

       I'm not a fan of dog shows at all but even I know that the affluence of a dog owner is not even remotely a consideration in judging.   

       Broad stroke generalization like that makes me crazy.
bristolz, May 03 2005

       I find the owners, just as in horse trotting, so much more amusing, and/or less talented, than their beloved, much behooved, payed out the ass for, anibeast,   

       Let the pooches run free, and the owner try and keep up. Let their tails flip down, poop do what poop do, and if there's a skuffle, so be it.   

       I sill + it, eventhough I did the Multiply thing, and now keep getting messages bounced back. So a - to po, for whatever fairy painting, ballerina idea she comes up with next.
blissmiss, May 03 2005

       good idea a few weeks ago i was watching a show about dogs (as you do) and they said that most pure bread dogs have genetic abnormalities due to their massive inbreeding
i wish i could go shit on the lawn aw i guess its just the porcelain giant for me

       oow gotta go hmm 04.32 not bad, the wiping slowed me down
andrew1, May 03 2005

       //most pure bread dogs have genetic abnormalities due to their massive inbreeding // Corn dogs?
AbsintheWithoutLeave, May 03 2005

       im not shure what a corn dog is but it still made me laugh
andrew1, May 05 2005

       Mmmmm corn dogs. Where's that other Mid-Westerner, Mr. Burns, who, besides me, was the only other person on Earth, who knew of a certain burger joint. He would know what the heck a corn dog is. If I get started on corn dogs, pages will quickly become chapters, and jutta or a mod will just tell me to shut my trap. I could go on and on, and on, about the virtues of a freshly dipped, freshly fried, country fair, corn dog. Teeny bit o' mustard...god I'm starving.
blissmiss, May 05 2005

       Thank you AA, but no description can quite compare, to the emotions, of the first crispy, juicy, squirt, of the dog, through the crust, at the opening season of summer county fairs. Nothing. (Still like the idea, but have recently not had time to eat very often. Sorry for highjacking your idea. Twas a good one, I thought.)
blissmiss, May 06 2005

       if you mean sausages on a stick deep fried with batter, yeah, we have those here, theyr called hotdogs
andrew1, May 06 2005

       Hot dogs, to us, are beef (usually) weiners in a bread bun.
AfroAssault, May 06 2005

       A pure bread [sic] bun?
coprocephalous, May 06 2005

       I hate dog shows. The only acceptable one would be a regular monthly program where dog owners are chased down and savaged by a pack of strays and then presented with a huge bill for the clean-up costs.
DrBob, May 06 2005

The Kat, May 06 2005

       //Hot dogs, to us, are beef (usually) weiners in a bread bun//yeah we have those too, we sometimes call them "american hotdogs"
andrew1, May 12 2005

       I had a beagle spitz mix as a kid. Maybe not a good mix, but some of the best memories of my childhood are chasing that noisy, pretty, dog.   

       I was considering mixing my kids shih tzu with a poodle to get a shih tzpoo, but we already had them fixed & they do that anyway.
Zimmy, Feb 22 2010


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