Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Hindenburg Suit

Not recomended for use on windy or flammable days
(+1, -1)
  [vote for,

What appears to be a shockingly obese Michelin Man leaps to the top of a house, scales a skyscraper in a manner of minutes, and jumps down, gliding to the ground like a flying squirrel.

Disappointingly, this is not a scene from a new action movie. It is simply a pedestrian/adrenaline junkie using the Balloon Suit, the latest in commuting/extreme sport technology.

The Balloon Suit would consist of multiple rubber envelopes of hydrogen gas, which would be positioned around a bodysuit made of moisture-wicking fabric (to prevent overheating). You would climb into it through a slot down the middle.

At best, it would only reduce your weight by 40-50 pounds, but that would be enough to allow you to preform some pretty impressive maneuvers. Wind would be a major hazard (getting blown into traffic is never fun), so a set of hooked poles would be provided, to anchor yourself when caught in a gust of wind, or for simply pulling yourself along.

Hydrogen is half as dense as helium, making it the preferable gas to use despite its flammability issues.

Velociraptor, Apr 05 2010

I don't understand why we're still on the ground. http://www.mrwonton.../images/uniblow.jpg
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Apr 06 2010]


       Where to begin?   

       OK, you claim a weight loss of 40-50 pounds. One cubic metre of hydrogen has a lifting force (in atmosphere) of something like 2lb per cubic metre. So, 40 pounds of lift meeds about 20 cubic metres, or a sphere about 10ft diameter, or roughly a smallish room.   

       You're actually going to wear this?   

       Also, the lifting advantage of hydrogen over helium is negligible.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 05 2010

       I really should have done some research before posting this. My confidence in lifting gases is woefully exaggerated.
Velociraptor, Apr 05 2010

       So, in the absence of any calculation, where did the "40-50 pounds" come from?
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 05 2010

       Honestly, I just pulled it out of thin air. Should I delete this idea now, seeing how it has absolutely no chance of working practically?
Velociraptor, Apr 05 2010

       Nah, I think it should stay here as Monument to Those Who Do Not Calculate.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 05 2010

       I'm sure we have done this recently, and one suggestion from before was to make the atmosphere denser in your vicinity to help with the bouyancy. Didnt it involve sleeping on the ceiling? helium filled pajamas? Someone with less apathy regarding the search box help me out here...
pocmloc, Apr 05 2010

       //One cubic metre of hydrogen has a lifting force (in atmosphere) of something like 2lb per cubic metre// Intruigingly implying that the lifting force per cubic meter varies with total volume. Perhaps this is due to some strange compressability of the gas, or gravitational tidal effects?
pocmloc, Apr 05 2010

       pocmloc - you are right. I meant to say "2.2lb per kilo", obvidently.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 05 2010

       [pocmloc]- That idea was mine. It was called "Hindenburg Pajamas", and I seem to remember that it got picked apart (this said perfectly cordially, of course) by you realists.   

       That said, this idea is perfectly legit. Once a base is set up on the Moon, it can be used by the astronauts in their dome- houses.
DrWorm, Apr 05 2010

       I'm wearing this now. No underwear.   

       Don't delete this idea now. Lets watch it go up in flames. Oh, the humanity. +
Mustardface, Apr 06 2010

       //getting blown into traffic is never fun// [marked-for-tagline]   

       re: idea... so how big would this thing be ?   

       //Hindenburg Pyjamas// yeah I remember that... something to do with fire escape: it floats you up and out of the house or something... perfect with Hydrogen.
FlyingToaster, Apr 06 2010

       I've worked out that a hydrogen-filled ball about the size of a human body would be able to lift an adult on Iapetus.
nineteenthly, Apr 06 2010

       200lb = 3000 cu ft. about 18' dia. sphere... given any thought to how you want to see out ? If your head sticks out the top it's not going to be the top for very long.
FlyingToaster, Apr 06 2010

       So you need a counterweight at the bottom.   

       Of course this weight has to be heavier than the passenger, meaning the suit has to have over 2x as much lift.
Wrongfellow, Apr 06 2010

       //I've worked out that a hydrogen-filled ball about the size of a human body would be able to lift an adult on Iapetus// Iapetus doesn't have an atmosphere, so a no amount of gas-filled balloon would be able to lift an adult (I assumed "human" here).
Nice try though.
coprocephalous, Apr 06 2010

       Would heating it help?
DenholmRicshaw, Apr 06 2010

       Why would you want to heat a moon?
coprocephalous, Apr 06 2010

       Iapetus, i think, probably has an extremely tenuous collisionless oxygen atmosphere. I was assuming some kind of enclosure with sea level atmospheric pressure in which one could float, and i imagined it to be white with pale blue stripes like the moon itself. And with that comment i've just realised i meant Enceladus, but i stand by what i said about the atmosphere, which is apparently largely water vapour and nitrogen.
nineteenthly, Apr 06 2010

       Enceladus is already heated by tidal forces i think. As to the suit, i expect it would a little, but only if it were very insulated.
nineteenthly, Apr 06 2010

       welcome to the halfbakery (who's your Mom?)
xandram, Apr 06 2010

       //If your head sticks out the top it's not going to be the top for very long.// you could mount your head on a long pole
pocmloc, Apr 06 2010

       I'm wondering how moisture-wicking fabric can prevent overheating in the middle of a big ball of insulation.
Voice, Apr 16 2017

       //If your head sticks out the top it's not going to be the top for very long.//   

       So, this is a Hindenburg Suit for giraffes, they'd probably appreciate being able to leap huge bounds to avoid lions.
not_morrison_rm, Apr 16 2017

       Giraffe's have the height, but they weigh over a tonne... I'm not sure the 10% weight reduction is going to mean much. How about snakes ?
FlyingToaster, Apr 16 2017


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