h a l f b a k e r yIt's as much a hovercraft as a pancake is a waffle.
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Kevlar Umbrella
Umbrella designed for cities with a high percentage of skyscrapers | |
An umbrella with Kevlar pannels instead of ordinary fabric, just in case of any pennies from heaven (or frozen peas for that matter)
DonBirnam's excellent vending machine idea
http://www.halfbake...20Vending_20Machine
[scubadooper, Oct 04 2004]
Class IIIa Ballistic Blanket
http://store.botach...l.com/poblbabl.html
Sew to a stainless steel reinforced umbrella frame to bake it. Only $1495, while supplies last. [Guncrazy, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
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Annotation:
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put a poison dart gun in the shaft and you have the perfect spy weapon ( not that i condone that type of behavior ) |
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That reminds me, must check the CIA's web site to see if it's baked already |
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You should also put a shock absorber in the shaft to avoid any broken wrists. |
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No need, the structure of the umbrella acts as a crumple zone and ensures a continuing demand for more umbrellas. |
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From what I surmised on some show on the Discovery channel or some such network, pennies won't really hurt you at all even if dropped from a skyscraper. They reach a pretty low terminal velocity due to air resistance. I suppose a freak wind-sheer might someday cause a penny to actually pierce someone on some planet in the universe, but the odds are pretty low as far as I can tell. They didn't test it, of course, but it may be possible that an ordinary umbrella would stop a falling penny. |
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Now, if you took this idea a few steps further and made basically a Combat Umbrella, with rather stiff, thick kevlar panels and a reinforced stem and handle, it could be useful for areas where urban warfare has broken out. Basically it'd be a pretty large shield on a stick, hehe. But hopefully waterproof and collapsible, and useful as an actual umbrella :) |
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This is close to the baked idea of selling kevlar jackets to urban parents who fear for the safety of their children on the way to school. |
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As Mr. [Mick] pointed out, this was last night's episode of MythBusters (Discovery channel in the US)! |
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A penny only reaches a terminal velocity of 64.4 mph (103.641754 kph), which stings when you're hit, but does nothing in the department of lasting damage. |
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But the skyscrapers that pose the issue of penny-dropping usually have ledges that prevent aforementioned coin from hitting the ground. |
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What about a hand dart terminal velocity? |
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With Size Mick combat umbrella you could jump from skyscrappers while seizing it firmly with both hands.
That would lower your terminal speed to something manageable so you don't hurt any pennies you land on. |
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There used to be a show on TV back in the early 80's called "That's Incredible", where they'd show all sorts of new hi-tech sort of gadgets, medical advances and the like. I remember one episode where they were talking about "bulletproof" fabric (presumably Kevlar). One of the applications they showed was an umbrella, so this idea has been halfbaked since at least then. |
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Strangely, though, I googled for one and didn't find anyplace you could buy one. However, you could make your own, I suppose (see link) |
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The biggest problem is broken glass, like in Chicago. For that you'd need a loosely woven or knit fabric, like what's used for chainsaw chaps. (Woven ballistic fabric is not that cut-resistant.) |
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