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Kill your TV

The Game where you get to Shoot People on TV
  (+44, -2)(+44, -2)(+44, -2)
(+44, -2)
  [vote for,

Whenever Elvis saw a show that annoyed him, he would shoot at his TV with his Magnum handgun. In this way Elvis wasted tens of televisions. I'm sure he got a lot of satisfaction from this... now that I have digital cable I often want to do it myself! I would like to re-create the delights of shooting at TVs but without the danger of imploding cathode ray tubes and firearms.

The objective of the game is simple... merely shoot people you don't like on TV. The player(s) each have a light gun. This can be pointed at the TV, in the same way you might do if you were playing House of the Dead. The light gun is connected to some kind of console. This machine works out if the shot was on-target and assigns a "kill" to the player.

In this open-ended game, the player can shoot at whomever he or she wants. As a result of a well-aimed burst of shots, the user will be rewarded with an amusing blood-splatter effect. Also, the game would keep track of a head-count, effectively the number of celebrities that each player has virtually maimed.

I would like each console to be somehow linked into a central database. From this it would be possible to work out which celebrities or TV commercials are being shot at the most. In this way, the gaming public could send a signal to the TV and advertising executives to get off their butts and make better television.

I suppose you could also link this kind of game into a TiVo type video recorder. Shooting at something - particularly commercials gives the user a more satisfying way to register their distaste.

There are three absurdly big challenges that would need to be overcome before a game like this could ever be made:

* Concerned parents might fear that this game might inspire another Columbine style high-school massacre.

* The technology to recognise human body shapes on a TV screen in real-time is still outside the capability of today's game consoles.

* TV and advertising executives would probably be upset that their "masterpieces" were being shot at.

I think the chances of anybody making a game like this within the next five years are very slim - still I shall live in hope.

salimf, Aug 26 2001

somewhat (dis)similar http://www.halfbake...20shock_20treatment
Remote electro-shocks for Live TV Guests/Performers [thumbwax, Aug 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(?) Smart Face Technology http://www.sundayherald.com/18007
Borders bookshop uses "Smart Face" technology to recognise known shoplifters in it's UK branches. [salimf, Aug 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(?) FaceIt Overview http://www.visionic...it/tech/detect.html
An overview of the Visonics face recognition technology. [salimf, Aug 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

Nerf® Razorbeast® http://nerfcenter.c...s-of/Razorbeast.htm
The poor man's version of this idea... [MrWrong, Aug 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(?) the song http://www.nedsatom...yrics/#Kill your tv
by ned's atomic dustbin [mihali, Aug 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(?) Modify people's faces in video, real-time, goofy mirror http://www.vincent-...apers/FG98/fg98.pdf
An amusing real-time special-effects carnival mirror. [Krate, Feb 09 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

Kill your TV... http://www.howstuff...hat-if-shoot-tv.htm
...with a 10/22. [supercat, Feb 09 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(?) T-shirt http://www.tshirthe...t.php?productid=247
Better T-Shirt Hell shirt. Warning: You'll hate me. [disbomber, Apr 03 2005]

(?) When you don't like a site www.netdisaster.com
Something no one would dare use on the HB. [Shadow Phoenix, Oct 24 2007]


       To be fair, you need a barrel on your cable adapter so that the subjects of your dementia can have a chance to reply in kind- maybe with paintballs.   

       As an interactive variation we could have one of those courtroom drama shows- except that the defendant sits in a wired chair and all of the game viewers can send +0.1 or -0.1 V through the lines according to opinions of guilt or innocence.   

       Not my dream of the future though.
magnesium man, Aug 27 2001

       Good and Well constructed idea
thumbwax, Aug 27 2001

       That's when you can buy the hand grenade or scud missile add on and blow the crap out of the show. Once you do this the show is blacklisted on your box and you don't ever get it again. Man I have some shows already lined up!
Juzzi, Aug 27 2001

       If you could just enable me to shoot the crap out of the casts of Friends and Ally McBeal, I would be a much happier man. Even if it isn't for real.
-alx, Aug 27 2001

       Magnisium Man: I take it the .1V alteration is to the absolute value of the voltage? Otherwise, the blatantly innocent get fried with a large, reversed-polarity voltage. <pedant> yes, it's technically the current which does the frying</pedant>
nick_n_uit, Aug 27 2001

       I don't watch TV, but I'm sure this particular "enhancement" would dramatically increase my devotion to the "idiot-box". I'm working on point number 2; the other two are irrelevant.
jabbers, Aug 27 2001

       I recently heard that a security firm has allready created technology that can recognise the faces and bodies of known shoplifers or football hooligans. I guess similar technology could be used to recognise TV personalities.   

       On TV people tend to be very well lit and often directly face the camera. This would make it easy for that sort of software to recognise the face.   

       The question is, how could the software identify the outline of a body - it would be crucially important to recognise when a shot was on-target.
salimf, Aug 28 2001

       Nick_n_uit: I suppose we should spare the innocents. Yeah, you'd only want to apply a negative to cancel a positive- some kind of huge diode needed, Details, details.   

       About recognizing the outlines of actors: Lots of assembly lines are using machine vision to recognize outlines of parts so that they can be turned the right way, etc. So that piece is ready.   

       You know, we wouldn't want everyone to have this. I think there should be a special "K" chip so only the most extreme could use it.
magnesium man, Aug 28 2001

       I had hoped that this product could be made available as a simple software product that could be installed on some kind of PVR / games console hybrid machine. I would want it to be affordable and widely available because everybody needs the opportunity to shoot their televisions. It's unfair that Elvis should be the only person to get away with this.   

       In addition to the software the game system would require a light-gun (or two) and the ability to download new face-profiles of celebrities in order that the bank of profiles on the disk do not become obsolete.   

       BTW, http://www.sundayherald.com/18007 describes "SmartFace" image recognition technology - it sounds like an ideal foundation for the Kill your TV concept.
salimf, Aug 28 2001

       Back in university, a roomie and I had the poor man's version of this: suction-cup dart guns (picked up at the local grocery store for $1.99 each). Wesley Crusher never looked better than with a fluorescent pink sucker dart in the middle of his forehead.   

       (Imagine my joy when I received a Nerf® Razorbeast® [link] for my birthday...)
MrWrong, Aug 28 2001

       ROFLMAO! Cool idea; let's just hope the techies get a move on with the necessary advances. On a down-side, there's ~always~ a down-side ;o), can you ~imagine~ how much fun your kid, sibling, spouse or in-law would get from waiting right until the climax of your favourite show and then acing the star?   

       Ex: "Someone in this room must be the killer; the man that killed Dr Dowes, the man that tried to kill me. By the process of elimination it can be none other than the esteemed-" BANG! BANG! WHOOSH! KABOOM!   

       Might I suggest VR-style headsets (nobody scream TECHNOLOGY at me) that can be worn by the players, thus leaving viewers to find out that it was, infact, the detective himself?
Zhade, Aug 28 2001

       I think this idea would create a whole new genre of programming that people just watch to shoot. Suddenly the swathes of drab cable viewing are precious opportunties for pot-shots!   

       I think the idea should be kept simple in order for it to work. It should be screen + console based. The only extrodinary extra component required should be a light-gun.   

       I thaught the idea about electric shocks was very funny, but IMO it should be kept simple. I would want this idea to work inspite of the TV comapnies.
salimf, Aug 28 2001

       I occasionally put a piece of paper on screen to cover a face - static electricity holds it there - you may wish to draw targets on one and use suction tipped darts. Pub or Lawn Darts at your own peril.
thumbwax, Aug 29 2001

       you could use the ned's atomic dustbin song to promote this. see link.
mihali, Aug 29 2001

       Interval Research made a video mirror. It uses a large plasma display and a camera. You walk up to it and it seems like a mirror. Then, suddenly, it makes your eyes bug out or your head pop up on a stalk of a neck, or some other funny effect. It detects your face, and then modifies the video on the fly. This could be used to implement your idea as well!
Krate, Feb 09 2002

       Ah, so that's what Paul Allen was spending all that money for . . . a mirror that would make him look less like a dork.
bristolz, Feb 09 2002

       Great idea. Let people vote with their mouse trigger as to what they approve of or disapprove of on TV.
blainez, Apr 23 2002

       lol. excellent. this could ACTUALLY be done. certainly on existing digital tv in the uk. many digital tv boxes have a serial port on the back, ideal for the gun.   

       maybe you could get grenades and things as well, for when ally mcbeal comes on.   

       what a stroke of genius salim!!   

       who fishboned? loser!
ferret, May 18 2002

       That's the Autoboner
thumbwax, Jul 23 2002

       And his wife, son, daughter and dog, by the look of it.
DrCurry, Nov 11 2003

       Could we get the TV character to say "ouch" each time you hit them..."Big fat wobbly bottomed, arm waving moron, COME ON DOWN ,Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!Ouch!"
Micky Dread, Nov 11 2003

       It's a good thing that "Friends" won't be on anymore, otherwise I would run out of ammo within minutes.
KLRico, Nov 11 2003

       What, no more Friends, I'm devastated.
Micky Dread, Nov 11 2003

       There was a T-Shirt Hell shirt that said something to the effect of "Friends is over; kill yourself". I couldn't find that one, so I'm linking a better T-Shirt Hell shirt.
disbomber, Apr 03 2005

AfroAssault, Apr 03 2005

       Damn! I just thought of this idea this year....   

       My wife immediately objected to the violent nature so I suggested a ray-gun looking apparatus that could be set to burn, splat, or even put up a glove that would slap the actor with a batman-style "Smack" baloon, with sounds effects, of course. I want one soooo bad!
MoreCowbell, Jun 07 2006

       My Dad did the scene in The Wall .. Take that, You **ckers! (Well, not that dramatically. I found the set in the attic 4 years later.)   

       What it did do, this outburst, was to force me to read everything I could get my hands on. The encyclopedia, The newspaper, The Bible, Each & every book I had I could relate to. (Just not the Koran, which almost got me kicked out of the house - hell, the book was hard enough to digest, anyway).   

       People now think I am odd for the things I know. People now think I am odd for the things I do not know. I know I was lucky all this happened when it did. American culture was not so dependent upon predictable sitcoms then as it is now.   

       I still stare blank eyed in some conversations amoung people who deem poor writing important in their lives.   

       I never had a Television in my house that worked until I got married. I am starting to think that the 2 1950's sets (that probably work - if I can find a few tubes) in my garage should be the only sets we watch TV on from now on.   

       & then, there is the worry that my kids will turn out like me. Oh no!
Zimmy, Jun 07 2006

       Good for you [Zimmy], I live in a similar situation. We have declined to hook up the cable for over five years now. My fiancee says the body image marketing is not good for her, and we can't find much good to watch anyway.   

       We go out to friends or a bar if there's something we want to see. That way we minimize our doseage.
normzone, Jun 07 2006

       [normzone] I must admit, I have had satellite programing for the last 5 years.(not my idea. My wife tricked me! I had every single American football game viewable in my fingertips for the first year (In the guise of a birthday gift). It was so beautiful, (for those non-North American residents, - go take a break, If you've played it you'll know it's more complicated than chess). Ok. The science I've seen on the satellite channels & the 6 other decent channels makes it hard for me to give it up.). I am not deserving of a "good for you" Now. I was when I lived alone. I had such oscillating good and badness then. funny.
Zimmy, Jun 07 2006

       [It would be a hard core all out fight to give it up. I would really miss it (but have no addiction, as far as I know), ]   

       Too funny. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.   

       Especially if family is accustomed to it. I could use a few of those football games, but only a few. Yes, the science I miss. I haunt the web a lot so that's where I get my video fix. I just know I'd watch it if I hooked it up, so I don't.
normzone, Jun 07 2006

wolstech, Jun 08 2006

       Very doable. Not sure how the light gun bit works, but you wouldn't need face recognition, just face detection. Pull the trigger on the light-gun, and the console takes a screen snapshot, records where the beam hit, detects faces in snapshot, and if the beam 'hit' is in a face area, superimposes a exploding blood/brains/etc graphic/animation over that region in the next few frames. Body detection is almost as simple. Very cool. Bun.
m_Al_com, Jun 09 2006

       What, you mean like Netdisaster for the TV? I suppose it could happen. [link]
Shadow Phoenix, Oct 24 2007


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