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Mini Animal Breeding Contest

"This year's winner, a cat the size of a mouse!"
  (+6)
(+6)
  [vote for,
against]

Breed small animals, enter them into contests, give trophies to the smallest.

Cats the size of mice, dogs the size of squirrels, horses the size of cats, elephants the size of dogs etc.

doctorremulac3, Feb 25 2020

Winner! https://www.youtube...watch?v=l8sTKhBREX0
[theircompetitor, Feb 25 2020]

Dammit Gulliver! https://www.nytimes...ores-evolution.html
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Feb 26 2020]

[link]






       Tiny humans, too ?   

       This is presumably purely by selective breeding - no GM cheating allowed ?
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       But we already have cats the size of mice. We call them "mice".   

       However, there would be a market for microphants, so [+].
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020
  

       Hmmmmm.   

       Elephants are the size they are because the very low grade foodstuffs they consume require a proportionately large digestive tract, and a big body to convey it.   

       Rabbits are forced to adopt a two-pass system for digesting cellulose-rich fodder.   

       Microphants would probably need some sort of engineered nutrition to allow them to survive and grow, but since a pocket elephant would be really cool, [+].   

       Also, Prior Art <link>
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       //Rabbits are forced to adopt a two-pass system// They're not, really. They're just really sick-minded.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020
  

       The opposite would be good too if applied to the insect world. Giant cockroaches could be used to munch through mountains of garbage, then made into McDonalds burgers and no one would notice the difference. Super-sized scorpions would be great "guard dogs", while hairy caterpillars make perfect feet warmers on a cold night. "Quick officer - he's getting away.... release the giant centipede...."
xenzag, Feb 25 2020
  

       "Sorry sir, he's still back at the station, tying his shoelaces"   

       // applied to the insect world. //   

       Unfortunately the size of terrestrial insects is limited by the size and strength of their exoskeleton, and their respiratory system.   

       A compromise design is still limited to something about the size of a coconut crab.
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       I know this is gross, but what happens if you take an animal fetus from the point that it's fully viable, that is, it can live on its own or with minimal supplemental live support systems, remove it and start giving it growth hormone blockers?   

       That took a dark turn quickly. Suddenly not such a cute idea eh?
doctorremulac3, Feb 25 2020
  

       On the contrary.   

       It should be possible to inject a PGH inhibitor into the amniotic fluid without affecting the parent. That might work. Worth a try, certainly...
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       //what happens if you take an animal fetus from the point that it's fully viable, that is, it can live on its own or with minimal supplemental live support systems, remove it and start giving it growth hormone blockers?// Tom Cruise is what happens.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020
  

       "The horror .... the horror ..."
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       Uneven growth problem leads to tiny hands! The horror..... the horror.....continues. (imagines sabre-toothed mongoose running amok) Great one doc.... still laughing at possibilities. [+]
xenzag, Feb 25 2020
  

       "... no, sir, it seems that what happend was that the victim was so incapacitated and distracted by laughter that the shrew came up behind them and nibbled them to death. Poor sod never stood a chance. Fortunately there was a Shrew Squad just down the block and they put a full clip of 37mm armour piercing into it.... the low-loader and the crane are on the way down to take the carcass away. But I don't like this sudden upsurge in incidents... first that rugby player getting munched by the chinchilla, then the schoolchildren being scooped up by the bat ..."
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       Thank you Xen, this was supposed to be sort of silly. :)
doctorremulac3, Feb 25 2020
  

       Haha. It's all fun and games until someone gets devoured by a gerbil...
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       Back in the 1950s-1980s, the Soviets tried to back-breed Eohippus (an ancestral horse, about the size of a hare). They were sort of getting there, and had something the size of a medium dog.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020
  

       The communists bred a tiny, primitive horse, the USA bred Tom Cruise ?   

       // a medium dog //   

       Could it ask Great-Uncle Wilfred what he did with the share certificates ?   

       Tell us more about this Marxism-Leninism... maybe it's not so bad after all.
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       + I'd like elephants the size of say, Corgis and giraffes trotting around tending to the shrubbery.   

       Even cows would be good, I reckon I could use all the milk from small 3-4 strong herd of Yorkshire-terrier sized examples.
bs0u0155, Feb 25 2020
  

       That might involve a yorkshire-terrier sized bull, though - all the ill-temper, aggression and intolerance of a one-tonne Frisian bull, but crammed down into seven kilos of ankle-butting testosterone-laden bovine.   

       Let us post a link to an article on Uranium enrichment. It's where you take one particular component of normal Uranium and concentrate it into a pure form. Obviously it takes up a lot less space, but oddly that makes it very much more reactive and dangerous....   

       It would make bullfighting a very different, and much more gory spectacle. It's one thing to face an angry bull at normal scale, but when that bull is small enough to run up your trouser leg and impale your wedding vegetables on its horns, it's all a bit one-sided...
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020
  

       Ah... the Island of Flores... [link]   
      
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