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Mission: Unloveable

The demand was simple: get him a date, or he'll blow up the planet. Good thing Harry Spears loves a challenge.
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British superagent Harry Spears is abducted in a way-too- elaborate, Rube-Goldbergian kidnapping plot. He finds himself in the clutches of a brilliant but irredeemably dorky wouldbe supervillain who calls himself "Dr. Michael Mechismo." Mechismo has one demand of the suave, sexy, and sophisticated Spears, who is notorious for his bedroom exploits:

"Get me laid."

Mechismo wants Spears to teach him everything he knows about romance and seduction, so he can get a woman to honestly love him. If Spears fails to help, Mechismo will detonate some doomsday device that wipes out the planet.

Spears, being an expert observer of human behavior, soon realizes what Mechismo doesn't, or rather won't: his real problem is that he is a heavily closeted gay man, and actually has no desire for women at all; he just thinks that he *should*.

(Spears might assemble a team to help teach Michael the ways of love... Or maybe he takes Michael on a tour of the world's glamour spots? Or does it turn out that Spears HIMSELF is bi, and they are actually meant for each other? I dunno...)

smendler, Feb 22 2013

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       I would go out of my way to avoid seeing even a preview of this movie.
rcarty, Feb 22 2013
  

       If you pay to get him to Thailand I'll get my old schoolmate, Ian, who owns a bar in Bangkok, to hook him up with a beautiful "lady" with a ten inch cock. He'll be "laid" before midnight.
UnaBubba, Feb 23 2013
  

       "Your missionary, should you choose to accept it..."   

       [Marked-for-deletion]
Kansan101, Feb 23 2013
  

       Unabubba is right the solution to problem in this movie is a ladyboy.
rcarty, Feb 23 2013
  

       marked on what grounds??
Voice, Feb 24 2013
  
      
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