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My First Meth Lab

Get them started right
  (+8, -3)
(+8, -3)
  [vote for,

Too many people have died in my area from meth labs gone wrong, so why not teach them right? With the Playskool "My First Meth Lab Kit" you can teach your toddler to become a successful druglord safely! Yes, little Billy will learn how to: use various household chemicals as substitutes for other ingredients, cut the purity with various agents, sell low quality crystals at high quality prices, dispose of the notorious "death bag" with ease, keep the cooking smells to a minimum so as not to alert the neighbors, and even how to elude police just like my cousin Jason! He's like Batman!
Kit includes: Beakers, chemicals, 9mm handgun, cell phone, and a bottle of chocolate milk.
AfroAssault, Jul 01 2001

Construction & Operation of Clandestine Drug Laboratories http://www.loompani...c+scstore.cfg+85178
Just one of many fine books from Loompanics Unlimited. (No gun; you're supposed to be smart enough not to need them.) [wiml, Jul 01 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]


       I'm in favour of crack and heroin being randomly lethal, just like Ecstasy. If the cretins using it are too stupid to realise that they're likely to die from it, at least they won't survive to clutter up the gene pool with their offspring. (minor edit, July 02)
angel, Jul 01 2001, last modified Jul 02 2001

       Diggit. Ain down widda plan, Jack...but the social satire is abundantly clear.
The Military, Jul 01 2001

       Just a quick fact for Angel to bear in mind. 250 000 people go fishing each week in the UK. In 1998 24 of them died in related accidents. 500 000 people take Ecstasy each week in the UK. In 1998 11 of them died in related incidents. Which is more randomly lethal?
Redbrickterrace, Jul 02 2001

       [Rbt]: 24 anglers may have died but *it wasn't fishing that killed them*. The deaths and comas caused by Ecstasy are directly attributable to the drug. (Let's not start a debate on this - we'll never agree. If you take E, I hope you survive the experience, but if you don't survive it, it's entirely your own fault.)
angel, Jul 02 2001

       oooh, a drugs debate. How interesting.
Pallex, Jul 02 2001

       My point may not have been that saliant admittedly, I just read what angel contributed, thought "ouch", and typed out a gut reaction. It was kind one of those kind of "damned lies" statistics you read every so often.   

       If I have a point, its just that people who take ecstasy don't deserve to die in the name of Darwinism, as was being suggested.   

       Damn - I didn't want to bring everyone down - I was just thinking out loud - don't take what I say to heart
Redbrickterrace, Jul 02 2001

       [Rbt]: //people who take ecstasy don't deserve to die in the name of Darwinism//
I didn't mean to suggest that they do, just that there is a significant risk in doing what they do, and if they should succumb to that risk they have only themselves to blame.
angel, Jul 02 2001

       angel - consider an olive branch being held out in your direction - hope i haven't offended
Redbrickterrace, Jul 02 2001

       [Rbt]: Not at all; I was olive-branching *you*.
angel, Jul 02 2001

       I wish you two would stop whacking each other over the head with olive branches.
Lemon, Jul 02 2001

       He started it!
angel, Jul 02 2001

       _All Tomorrow's Parties_ has sugar-candy sold in a 'meth lab' - that is, the point was to mix sugary glop until it looked like drugs. There was a molded plastic doodah involved.   

       AfroAssault, maybe you'd like the book.
hello_c, Jul 02 2001


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