h a l f b a k e r y
Contrary to popular belief
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I set the ball rolling with:
A mouse he would a-browsing go
Whether his motherboard let him or no
and retire to the stands.
(?) Cartoon. Same joke.
[jutta, Dec 13 2001]
Collection of stanzas. Similar joke.
Anticlimax ending rather than ha-ha Computers. [jutta, Dec 13 2001]
For neelandan: "The owl and the pussy cat"
Unlike [arora]'s annotation, it doesn't involve text messages. [cp, Dec 15 2001, last modified Oct 17 2004]
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Description (displayed with the short name and URL.)
||Jack and Jill went up the hill,
To upgrade their Nokia handsets.
Jack came down,
And typed around,
So he could send Jill a quick text.
||Boys and girls come out to play,
the moon doth shine as bright as day,
Leave your cubicle and leave your sleep,
join your mates on Bakers Street,
Come with a whoop and come with a call,
Come with a fishbone or not at all,
Up the ladder and down the wall,
Flocking road cones will serve us all;
you find the custard and vagina jam,
and we'll have a croissant and loads of spam.
||The owl and the fussy cat went to sea
on a beautiful pod green boat,
They took some money and 'slices of honey',
wrapped up in a fifty quid note,
The owl hooked up to the network above,
and text'd in a romantic way,
O lovely cat, oh cat my love, what a beautiful cat I say, I
What a beautiful cat I say.
||<umpire's hat> fweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!
jutta: enjoyed those links, but I'd have difficulty reading them to a five year old.
UB: couldn't place the original.
po: For kids! (title changed). Sorry about that, but my intention was to have a load of rhymes ready for small kids - side by side with the originals.
arora: thanks, but same comment.
Ari: You've hit the nail on the head!
||I can't remember the name of the song that Una's parodying, but it sounds vaguely familiar, and I'm sure I could have named it when I was 6 years old (-:
||See link for the poem "owl and the pussy cat" that [arora] altered.
||teddy bears picnic <UB's unfinished rhyme>
||I can't believe you have nothing better to do. Are you just practising on us?
||Humpty Dumpty sat in a mall.
Humpty Dumpty had a speedball.
All the king's dollars and all the king's dimes,
Couldn't get Humpty to E.R. in time.
||Humpty Dumpty rode a fast car,
Humpty Dumpty had a great smash.
All the world's surgeons
And super glue
Couldn't put Humpty Dumpty
||Doctor Foster culled half of Gloucester
With morphine administered like rain
He slipped up one summer
got caught - what a bummer
Now in jail, never to be seen again.
Come little Johnny, come to me
Let me hear your Q W E
Q W E R T Y U
I O P A S D F
G H J K L Z X
C V B N M
Now you heard my Q W E
Tell me what you think of me
Very good, Johnny, Very good.