Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Operator Papier-Mâchè Modelling Shredder

Instant Maquettes
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[based on a throwaway line in "Obfuscating Shredder"]

Basic shredders are not secure enough - you can, with a bit of patience, stick all the bits back together. Cross-cut shredders are better, but what could be more secure than a papier-mâchè modelling shredder?
This shredder would cross-cut your documents, mix them with water and glue, scan the operator standing in front of the machine (who has chosen to adopt a pose out of "Saturday Night Fever"), and then mould the papier-mâchè into a tiny model of the operator.
When you have enough statues of yourself around the offfice, you can get the machine to make papier-mâchè models of logs for burning in your fireplace.
hippo, Jan 27 2004

For [wagster] https://www.youtube...watch?v=1zLMBAl-aqQ
..." To all my friends ! " [normzone, Sep 01 2015]

xkcd https://xkcd.com/2369/
Today's XKCD cartoon! [hippo, Oct 08 2020]

3d printing using paper maché https://newatlas.co...p-3d-printer/57153/
[xenzag, Oct 08 2020]

[link]






       This is fantastic!
calum, Dec 29 2005
  

       excellent. happy new year, hippo.   

       <holds hand up> put your mod hat on for a mo. why is this idea not emboldened in my recent view? I thought it was a churned idea for a few moments.
po, Dec 29 2005
  

       And if someone steals your information, you know who took it.
Jscotty, Dec 29 2005
  

       But [po], it's dated early 2004. Good churn, [calum].
Worldgineer, Dec 29 2005
  

       Duh! how the hell was this ignored for a year?
po, Dec 29 2005
  

       The same way a lot of good ideas are missed. Like my "Pothole-based GPS calibration" idea posted earlier this month (hint).
Worldgineer, Dec 29 2005
  

       Timing is everything. Posting during a lull can let a good idea sink unnoticed, and posting during a flurry of good ideas can do the same.   

       Like all my ideas (hint).
normzone, Dec 29 2005
  

       odd - I could have sworn this had some annotations betwen Jan '04 and Dec '05
hippo, Jan 01 2006
  

       I don't think the "Pothole-based GPS calibration" idea was so much ignored as it was left alone out of a strange mix of apathy and exasperation.   

       At least that's my take on it...
zigness, Jan 03 2006
  

       I would post them to all my friends so they wouldn't ever have to be without me...
wagster, May 18 2008
  

       I'd prefer a pinata version, with candy inside. You can then post them to your friends who might harbor negative feeling toward you.
Worldgineer, May 19 2008
  

       3D printing has made this idea almost do-able now
hippo, Sep 01 2015
  

       I'll vote for this as long as the glue price is not set to pay the subsidy of the the shredder price.
wjt, Sep 02 2015
  

       //3D printing has made this idea almost do-able now// Yes indeed....[link] I have been researching 3d printing using glass, and this cropped up amongst other materials. As with many ideas, the HB lead the way.
xenzag, Oct 08 2020
  

       Have the document scanned and use it to pick the model of what's being printed.   

       So if it's contract to buy a house, the scanner sees the word "house" repeated more than anything else (nouns only) and it makes a little model of a house. That way you can remember what the document is about by having a collection of these things for a while.   

       Eventually you could throw them all into the recycling bin after enjoying them for a few months or years.
doctorremulac3, Oct 08 2020
  

       [Dr R.E. Mulac III] - An intriguing suggestion. Is there though a risk that this would lead to people printing out, and then swiftly shredding, erotic stories?
hippo, Oct 08 2020
  

       I would feed it with philosophy papers to see what it came out with
pocmloc, Oct 08 2020
  

       Fine, just don't let it teach itself phenomenology ...
8th of 7, Oct 08 2020
  

       //Is there though a risk that this would lead to people printing out, and then swiftly shredding, erotic stories?//   

       Yes, and unfortunately, I had no control of the visualization of what one of those models might look like. Probably something you wouldn't want to display on shelves in the office.
doctorremulac3, Oct 08 2020
  
      
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