Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Replace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...

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RC Dirigible Galley

we'll cover cooking/inflating some other time
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We've all seen drawings or read stories of sailing ships attached to dirigibles, but they all seem to be powered by aircraft propellers... how unoriginal.

The "Flying Scull" is a radio-controlled model of a mythical flying ship: a cigar-shaped hydrogen dirigible, close underslung by a pirate-ship (sans sails), cannons fixed on the deck, sides and keel, and two banks of oars with very broad curved blades protrude from each side.

As you can imagine, an individual oar sweep consists of a back stroke with the blade in a vertical position, followed by a forestroke in the horizontal position. In order to compensate for asymmetric drag, the front oars angle to push the air slightly upwards as well as back, the rear oars slightly downwards. Forward and backward motion, turning and a certain amount of pitch control are all available to the operator as well as preprogrammed "dance" modes. Having only a very slight negative buoyancy, altitude can be gained by using the oars in a vertical direction.

The cannons of course really fire.

Also available is the "Air Viking": a Nordic longboat variety.

FlyingToaster, Oct 06 2008

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       Your oars will have to move very quickly if they're to have much effect.
Voice, Oct 06 2008
  

       why ? Think of a bunch of small poles, each with a feather on the end.
FlyingToaster, Oct 06 2008
  

       They won't catch enough air. A bird requires hundreds of feathers to fly.
Voice, Oct 06 2008
  

       what if I stick a big balloon on top filled with hydrogen ?
FlyingToaster, Oct 06 2008
  

       // a bunch of small poles, each with a feather on the end. //   

       Crewing your pirate ship with little Polish chidren is probably not going to be popular; firthermore, the Poles are not reknowned for their participation in activities piratical.
8th of 7, Oct 06 2008
  

       I read this as "Dirigible Gallery", and imagined the Tate Helium gliding majestically above the Thames, twixt Tate and Tate Modern
coprocephalous, Oct 06 2008
  

       Believe it or not I've seen a patent for this. Not RC though.   
      
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