Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Remote Mafia

  [vote for,

prelude... The breathless messenger bursts in to the kitchen of the large estate, The stale air reeking of garlic, tomato sauce, fresh clams and huge, muscled Mafiosi, dressed in designer wife beaters. The messenger throws the package onto the kitchen table, hoping and praying that it is good news, hoping and praying to see another day.

The box is ripped open, and inside: a single, vintage, mid-century Zenith television remote. Everyone freezes. Gasps of horror. "We've been selected", Guido finally manages to say.


In these times of economic crisis, even the Mafia has to institute cost saving time-management procedures. When the capo di capo comes to town, and all the gang is holed up in the gatehouse, why should they just waste time watching television?

With the new Laser Activated Television Channel Changer, Da boys can practice their marksmanship, and their quick draw techniques without ever having to drive out to the country, saving a small fortune in fuel costs and bullets.

With their laser sights firmly attached to their hand guns, they can change channels, adjust the volume, and turn the television on and off, just by shooting the appropriate buttons on the large remote target mounted on the wall.

Save time, save money, and most of all, BECOME BETTER BODY GUARDS with the new


r_kreher, Jun 27 2008

Fire Away!! It's Safe!! It's a LASER!!! http://www.spartanb...emote-gun-final.jpg
[r_kreher, Jun 27 2008]

http://www.amazon.c...l-Gun/dp/B000VVU8SW [2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jun 27 2008]

he isn't in the mafia http://www.gadgetiz...remote-control-gun/
[r_kreher, Jun 27 2008]


       day three, still no annos. I should get some rest. I'll try yet again to sleep. Tomorrow, after a hearty breakfast and some Mountain Dew, I'll redraft. Yes. tomorrow.
r_kreher, Jun 27 2008

       Ah, the Elvis remote. Kinda baked. [link]   

       not even close. <link>
r_kreher, Jun 27 2008

       Ahem. It's a bit close.
daseva, Jun 27 2008

       ok, ballpark close. not Gillette Atra close.
r_kreher, Jun 27 2008


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