h a l f b a k e r y
Not just a think tank. An entire army of think.
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
or get an account
This idea is actually two ideas.
The first idea is the Rent-A-Jesus crew. They are a group of
skilled visual artists whose talents range from sculpture to
cooking. All of them are trained to be able to craft an identical
vision of Jesus on command. For a fee, Rent-A-Jesus will come
a specified location and fashion a Jesus sighting of any type.
could, for example, carefully congeal a vat of cheese under
controlled conditions so that the visage of the Messiah peers
of it. They would also be able to angle the lightbulbs on your
porch so that a ghostly Jesus appears at night on your welcome
mat. And it wouldn't be inconceivable for these experts to
your sleeping Great Dane's fur so that an image of the Passion
enacts itself on their shifting body. No matter what they do,
newly Jesused item is sure to become a tourist attraction and
pilgrimage site for years to come, earning you 15 minutes of
The second idea is the Rent-A-Jesus TV show, "While You Were
Out, I Summoned Jesus". The show follows the crew as, given
permission by a friend or loved one who's in on the prank, they
carefully fix up an unknowing person's home while they're out.
When the subject returns and is confronted by a deftly hidden
Jesus, a concealed camera captures their reaction. Frantic
prayer, last-minute confessions, and quick conversions, along
other hilarious hijinks, are to be expected. The best part of
episode is when it is revealed to the prostate worshiper that
have been Punk'd! Hit ratings and multiple damnations are sure
A Jesus 'o Lantern
As featured on christiancrafters.com - maybe they'd help out? [wagster, Mar 22 2010]
[xenzag, Mar 22 2010]
||Yes. Great. Or a Jesus actor appearing in a hidden camera
setting to record the skepticism of the devout or whatever
shenanigans might ensue. Maybe that show that catches
paedophiles showing up could have Jesus come out instead of
that journalist. I'd like to Jesus appear on as a celebrity
contestant on various shows too. There'd need to be some
professional magic to maximize believability. The Jesus images
you propose would probably take in more people, though.
||Next Up~ Borrow-a-Buddha~
||Wasn't this baked by Depeche Mode?
||The lower budget competitor would be a Save-A-
||The "Mary" version of this is already baked in many countries.... Ireland in particular. As regards Jesus - "He" is already everywhere and can be found! (promotes own, much older idea - see link)
||Hey look everybody that guy's got a solution to everybody's existential crisis!
||// He only evaded capture as a terrorist ... due to there not being any photographic evidence //
||The National Enquirer would be your friend here, we understand.
||// People were being falsely accused ... just because they had a beard //
||Ah no, often they were Irish without due care and attention too.
||Corrected! I swear it was a typo. I certainly didn't mean to
say "prostate". If there's any organ worth worshiping, it's the
||//prostate worshiper// [DrWorm] please don't correct that.
It's so much more interesting as it stands.
||Fair enough, considering that I forgot to fix it in the first