Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Royal Air Display

Give your home a false air of royalty today
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A nondescript warehouse is situated on a street at the rear end of Buckingham Palace.

Inside the warehouse, a dazzling crown sits atop a seemingly empty glass tank. The tank is the size of a school gymnasium and is draped in royal red velvet curtains. At select times the curtains are drawn to reveal to the public the air-tight tank, which contains a captured fart / morning breath from every volunteering member of royalty on Earth.

Visitors are able to walk round the perimeter of the Air Display, and though its contents are tantalisingly unsmellable, tour guide headsets resembling gas masks can be hired for pumping replica scents into the wearer's nose.

Leaflets contain info on the contributing kings, queens, dukes and duchesses, and the times, locations and manner of their contributions. For those feeling inspired by their visit an open window is provided for contributing to the Public Air Display.

Available for purchase in the gift shop are smaller fish-tank sized 'Royale' Air Displays, containing farts from royal family impersonators. Give your home a false air of royalty today!

Treejuice, Jun 03 2019


       With careful altering of temperature and pressure in the tank, there might even be some light fluffy royal plumes actually seen.
wjt, Jun 03 2019

       I would love to be able to afford sky writing that America's fascist moron Trump could not avoid seeing during his visit here.
xenzag, Jun 03 2019

       Xen, that sounds like a great Go-fund-me project.
RayfordSteele, Jun 03 2019

       Gross [-]
notexactly, Jun 20 2019


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