Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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RuggedAir Travel Outfitters

Store that equips travelers for the rigors of modern air travel.
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As air travel gets worse, modern air travelers need specialized equipment to help them reach their destinations reasonably fed, rested, and unhassled. A worldwide chain of RuggedAir stores would offer products designed to help the traveler endure a tourist-class (or bad first-class) seat for up to 24 hours. The stores' wares would include: (1) a bill cap with drop-down wraparound sunglasses (to shut out bad in-flight movies), built-in 30-hour MP3 player, and sound-blocking headphones that damp out external shrill noises above 90dB; (2) a Kevlar jump suit (to guard against air rage); (3) a multipocket vest with inflatable shoulder-pad pillows, velcro closures (for easy removal at checkpoints); (4) flat, thermal food-and-water containers; (5) a palm appliance with a database of airport layouts, a backlit screen, and a file of interesting reading; (6) a locator-transponder for keeping track of wayward luggage and/or offspring.

"Upgrade your flight experience once and for all...RuggedAir."

whatsbruin, Sep 05 2001

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