h a l f b a k e r y
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A large purple soft furry talking bear not to dissimilar to Baloo that likes a hug by you.
Congratulations! you have just adopted your very own Scare bear.The instruction manual continues.Once the toy is introduced to the child, ask the child what his/her favourite number is between one and ten and ask for it to be written down and placed within the secret hiding place.
For example if
the number is four, ask the child to turn Scare bear's left ear four times and press the nose.With this, an audible 'Hey that tickles' is heard and the bear's face lights up with a beaming smile and insists on being hugged.
Scare bear is now activated with the child's code.After a short time if no attention is given, Scare bear will deactivate until the process is repeated.
Scare bear comes with an inventory of pre-recorded sentences and pleasant sayings to occupy the child.
However if another child attempts to play with the bear, for example grabs an arm or leg or does not turn the ear four times and press the nose,the bear will go tight pinched faced, bearing teeth and hissing insanely and hurling childish abuse.
That's one scary bear.
I think the royalties have been snapped up on this one already [PainOCommonSense, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
||Get yer kid a dog, fer goodness' sake.
||Make it a bear that doesn't shit in the woods.
||I'll remain neutral.......