Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Simultaneous Start and Finish Race

Race where all contestants start and finish simultaneously
  (+3, -1)
(+3, -1)
  [vote for,

In this race, the runners line up as usual at the start line. Each runner wears a body harness with a loop at the back. A line is clipped to the loop; the line is wound around a computer-servo-controlled drum.

On the starting signal, the runners all start running.

As the runners run, the line unreels from each of their servo-drums. The networked computer drums calculate how fast the line is unreeling, and how much it has unreeled, and predicts the estimated finish time of each runner crossing the line. The system then adjusts the resistance of each unreeling drum so as to slow down the fastest runners with the aim of making each runner have a predicted simultaneous finishing time. This estimate and adjustment is run continuously through the race.

All the runners, no matter their ability or effort, cross the finish line at exactly the same moment.

Gold medals all round.

pocmloc, Jun 04 2022

"Everybody is equal!" https://en.wikipedi...i/Harrison_Bergeron
The satirical version. How do we find those that are the best, if we are all "equal"? [neutrinos_shadow, Jun 06 2022]

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       So, Le Mans for pedestrians?
pertinax, Jun 04 2022

       Probably best for short-ish straight tracks e.g. 50m, 100m
pocmloc, Jun 04 2022

       So you could either award everyone the same, or you could work out who put the most work[1] in. I think the latter is interesting in that it would remove (or at least change) the psychology of racing. Noone would know who was in the lead until the race was over.   

       [1] in the physics sense.
Loris, Jun 04 2022

       If everyone gets a medal why bother with the race? [-] unless this is satire, in which case [+/-]
Voice, Jun 06 2022

       Wisdom is its own reward. Perhaps the same can be said for speed?
RayfordSteele, Jun 07 2022

       Not everyone gets a medal, only the people who run in the race get a medal.
pocmloc, Jun 07 2022

       It occurs to me that someone can spoil the race by moving very slowly.
Loris, Jun 07 2022

       Maybe if that caught on there could be a second rope attached to the front of the harness leading to another drum on the far side of the finish line
pocmloc, Jun 07 2022

       [+] but instead of unwieldy lines, have each track include hydraulic ramps. The fast ones are sprinting uphill, slow ones re sprinting downhill. They all finish at the same time but the highest one wins. The top 3 can stay put after the race is over since these ramps also double as a podium.
ixnaum, Jun 10 2022

       So, the tortoise, is, the hare.

       ..that's deep.   


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