Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Speed Baseball

Three hours in the sweltering heat, just to see my team loose? Are you nuts?
  (+3, -4)
(+3, -4)
  [vote for,

Baseball may be the U.S.A's natinal passtime, but who the hell has _that_ much time? At the end of the day, Major League Baseball's games last too long, and are played too much too often. Whats neede is a faster game, somethign that won't take up all you free time on the weekends, and that you won't miss during the week.

1. No more during the day week-day games. Games to be played on Wednesday nights, Saturdays, and maybe Friday nights.

2. No more series of games. How wants to watch team A play team B five times, and still loose? Its boring. Thats probably why they have interleague play, to compensate for the boredom caused by seeing the same teams play each other five times in a row.

3. Maximum of nine bats per side per inning. Who wants to see nine team memebers bat nine times an inning? (Okay, so this hardly ever happens, but one team gets a good streak going and there could be 15 bats in one inning)

4. Maximum of two balls. If the guys gonna get walked, you might as well not play mind games with him.

5. No muckin' around between innings. The batting teams in the dug-out anyway, they might as well roll-on roll-off, non-stop.

6. If after 9 innings there is no winner, then its home-run-derby-style five bats per team, most home runs win.

7. No more national anthems. Its bad enough when its just U.S. teams playing, but a verse of O' Canada as well? Its just over the score.

Game finished just in time for dinner.

[ sctld ], Jul 31 2002

another way to speed up baseball http://www.dangerou...m/january_jokes.htm
look under 18 january [mihali, Oct 02 2002]


       Stick to the cricket, chum.
DrCurry, Jul 31 2002

       Cricket lasts even longer, and its more complicated.
[ sctld ], Jul 31 2002

       But baseball provides something that not watching baseball doesn't; the chance that something might happen.
[ sctld ], Jul 31 2002

       soccer lasts 90 minutes, you swap ends at half-time & and you get to exchange clothing at the final whistle, whilst kissing and hugging .......   

       you can keep your daft games.
po, Jul 31 2002

       I think that on balance, most ball games are dullasf*#k to watch anyway. Playing them is ok, at least you get some exercise. But why anyone would want to watch someone else playing. Now to add some true entertainment to say, golf, why not have randomly exploding golf balls! Or cricket balls or whatever type of ball. 'Extreme cricket' would be a lot more interesting than the hours and hours of poncing about the spectators are subjected to at the moment.
briandamage, Jul 31 2002

       If you don't find any elegance in the complex game of baseball, then maybe you should just find a different sport that fits your attention span (no offense, I truly mean it). Try ping-pong or something.
Andrew Pershing, Oct 02 2002

       I lost my love of the game due to pro player greed.
thumbwax, Oct 02 2002

       I wish they had Speed FOOTBALL. I can't stand it when I want to play nintendo on the only TV in the house and someone is watching a three hour long football game.
Amishman35, Oct 02 2002

       Its got nothing to do with attention span, AP. Sy the game starts at 3, and you have dinner reservations. The game takes it time pissin' around, stopping for advertisers, wasting time, extra innings. You either miss the end of the game, or you miss your meal. 'Tis because i like baseball that i want to make it run a bit faster.   

       And don't get me started on how all the stopping and starting affects your attention span. I told you cheerleaders are evil.
[ sctld ], Oct 02 2002


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